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By Victoria Wood. 1996
'Absolutely perfect. All Christmas presents sorted. No notes.' Sarra ManningBabs (on telephone): Acorn Antiques, can I help you? Gainsborough's Blue…Boy? Yes, I think we have it in mauve, I'll just check.Flips over blank bits of paper.Yes, we do; shall I pop it under the counter for you? Not at all, bye!Chunky contains the complete scripts of Wood's beloved wobbly-walled spoof soap opera Acorn Antiques, as well as the Kitty monologues: 'My name's Kitty. I've had a boob off and I can't stomach whelks so that's me for you.'It also features daytime television presenters Margery and Joan, Susie the waspish Continuity Announcer, and the unforgettable bus stop stories of Kelly-Marie Tunstall: 'I said I'll tell everyone what happened on Christmas Eve when you drank two pints of correcting fluid and sexually harassed me with an outsize party squeaker'.Published to mark the 70th anniversary of Victoria Wood's birth, this stunning revised edition of Chunky collects the very best of Wood's sketches, shows and more featuring:NEW introduction from Celia Imrie, star of many of Victoria Wood's showsAdditions and annotations from Wood's acclaimed official biographer, Jasper Rees.This is a true celebration of an inimitable and greatly missed comedic genius.'I was very proud to be part of her gang.' Celia Imrie'There was none like her before and there's been none like her since - she was unique.' Dawn French'She is on a par with Alan Bennett.' Clive James
By American Mensa. 2023
American Mensa presents: The Brilliant Bathroom Reader—The ultimate book of 5,000 facts curated by the world's smartest brand. Perfect to expand…any curious mind! Whether gearing up for a big trivia night or simply wanting to give your brain something interesting to think about, this big book of 5,000 facts from the smartest brand in the world fits the bill. These facts will make you think. They&’ll make you wonder. You may even want to research more about some of these topics. Most of all, you&’ll have a ton of fun learning about everything from Thomas Edison&’s attempts at mind reading to Dr. Lucy King&’s beehive fences that scare elephants from destroying farms. We cover as many topics as possible, including facts that got our attention while weeding out the stuff that made us yawn or go, &“Yeah, yeah, I&’ve heard that one a million times.&” Topics include: Flora, Fauna, and FungaScience and TechnologyWorld CultureHistory US PresidentsNational ParksArt, Fashion, and LiteratureArchitectureHealthComicsMusic and EntertainmentSports and LeisureBizarre but TrueThe Brilliant Bathroom Reader is the perfect gift for learning new and exciting facts whenever you have a spare moment or two.
By Robert Skinner. 2023
"A decidedly skewed, hilarious collection of life reflections and colorful storytelling." — Kirkus ReviewsAn endlessly entertaining collection of wayward autobiographical…tales about a search for a richer life thwarted at every turn by beagles, bureaucrats, and ill-advised love affairsThe unlikely story of how a failed dishwasher, tour guide, cabinet maker, bus driver, bookseller and literary journal publisher became one of Australia's hottest humor essayists Perfect for fans of humorous, thought-provoking authors like Sloane Crosley, Jenny Lawson, Samantha Irby, and David SedarisThis wryly subversive book of adventures (and misadventures) offers an original and utterly hilarious take on work, escape, and that something more we all need. Robert Skinner arrives in the city, searching for a richer life. Things begin badly and then, surprisingly, get slightly worse. Pretty soon he's sleeping rough and trying to run a literary magazine out of a dog park. His quest for meaning keeps being thwarted, by gainful employment, house parties, ill-advised love affairs, camel trips, and bureaucratic entanglements.The book's 14 essays/stories can be savored one at a time, or binge read:War and PeaceThe Perfect HostCinderella Pays the RentLessons from CamelsHow to Make It in BusinessThe StopoverKings of SwedenHouse PartyCar SickI Fought the LawAlways Coming HomeThe Art of Tour GuidingA Fisherman&’s LamentEpilogue: Dying Art of HitchhikingRobert's distinctive voice possesses uncommon immediacy, at once humorous and soulful, self-effacing and wise. Perhaps most important of all, he is endlessly entertaining.
By Kyle Mann. 2023
From the satirical minds behind the viral sensation The Babylon Bee comes the latest installment of its guide series. This…looks at the two "original gangsta" genders—male and female—shows us the progressively insane slide into the multiplying number of genders that has lately been spiraling out of control.The third entry in the bestselling Babylon Bee Guide series explores the whole colorful rainbow of genders. Men! Women! And millions more! Featuring gorgeous custom artwork, infographics, charts, and interactive features, every page will catch the eye with hilarious observations about the differences between the two original genders and all the new ones we&’ve just recently made up. Features will include: Diagrams documenting the biological and behavioral differences between men and women How to tell if you are a man or a woman How to choose your gender How to change genders if the mood strikes Interviews with experts in which we ask, &“What the heck is a woman, anyway?&” What it means to be a father What it means to be a mother (or is that &“birthing person&”?) How to get a good woman/man to fall for you Comprehensive coverage of all the imaginary genders besides men and women Hall of fame: best men and best women in human history Through The Babylon Bee&’s patented satirical voice, this book will tell you everything you need to learn about gender identity, transgenderism, and biological sex. Use it to teach your kids before their first-grade teacher does!!
By Dan Gutman. 2023
From the best-selling author of My Weird School: a new entry in the cheerful and engaging biography series centered on…high-interest historic figures. Did you know that John Lennon’s mom called him “Stinker” because he farted so much? Or that Paul McCartney liked playing guitar in the bathroom? Bet you didn’t know that George Harrison once had his friend’s parent sign his report card, or that Ringo Starr’s grandma thought he was possessed by witches! Paige and Turner have collected some of the most unusual and surprising facts about the rock stars, from their childhoods and early days as musicians to the formation of the Beatles and their rise to become the greatest band of all time. Narrated by the two spirited siblings and animated by Allison Steinfeld’s upbeat illustrations, Wait! What? The Beatles Couldn’t Read Music? is an authoritative, accessible, and one-of-a-kind biography infused with Dan Gutman’s signature zany sense of humor.
By Leslie Jones. 2023
Hey you guys, it&’s Leslie. I&’m excited to share my story with you. Now, I&’m gonna be honest: Some of…the details might be vague because a b*tch is fifty-five and she&’s smoked a ton of weed. But while bits might be a touch hazy, I can promise you the underlying truth is REAL. Whether I&’m talking about my childhood growing up in the South, my early stand-up days driving from gig to gig through the darkest parts of our country and praying I wouldn&’t get murdered, what Chris Rock told Lorne Michaels, that time I wanted to shoot Whoopi Goldberg on SNL, and yeah, I&’ll tell you all about Ghostbusters and the nudes and Supermarket Sweep and The Daily Show . . . I&’m sharing it all in these pages. It&’s not easy being a woman in comedy, especially when you&’re a tall-*ss Black woman with a trumpet voice. I have to fight so that no one takes me for granted, and no one takes advantage. These are the stories that explain why. (Cue the Law & Order theme.)
By Taylor Wolfe. 2023
The funny and poignant story of one woman’s wonderfully codependent relationship with her dog – and what he taught her about chosen family and…the reward of motherhood.Birdie & Harlow is the story of a baby and a dog. But motherhood is never quite that simple. In Taylor Wolfe’s case, it’s a long, zigzagging and winding road.Meant to be a last-minute anniversary gift for her then boyfriend (and now husband), the highly-energetic and loud-mouthed Vizla puppy named Harlow turns out to be the best snap decision twenty-year-old Taylor ever makes—and the beginning of the most epic friendship she ever has. As Wolfe’s resistance to 9-5’s and traditional adulthood grows, Harlow becomes the perfect companion for her eccentricities in a world that thrives on conformity. Wolfe’s twenties—full of pitfalls and surprises, sad days and silver linings—led her to the realization that life is too short to spend your days in a crate (or a cubicle), that parks are meant to be enjoyed, and most importantly, she wants to be a mom. But really, isn't she one already? A charming and touching memoir, Birdie & Harlow is a tribute to the many expressions of modern motherhood, to both human and fur babies alike. Taylor’s story reminds all of us that life will surprise you and that families should come in every shape and size.
By Aparna Nancherla. 2023
&“A deeply honest and funny look at how exhausting it can be to live a human life, Unreliable Narrator is…a book for anyone who wants to laugh and feel less alone.&”—Amy Poehler A hilarious and insightful collection of essays exploring impostor syndrome, from the inside and out, by the most successful fraud in comedyAparna Nancherla is a superstar comedian on the rise—a darling of Netflix and Comedy Central&’s comedy special lineups, a headliner at comedy shows and music festivals, a frequenter of late night television and the subject of numerous profiles. She&’s also a successful actor who has written a barrage of thoughtful essays published by the likes of the New York Times. If you ask her, though, she&’s a total fraud. She&’d hate to admit it, but no one does impostor syndrome quite like Aparna Nancherla.UNRELIABLE NARRATOR is a collection of essays that uses Aparna&’s signature humor to illuminate an interior life, one constantly bossed around by her depression (whom she calls Brenda), laced with anxiety like a horror movie full of jump-scares, and plagued by an unrepenting love-hate relationship with her career as a painfully shy standup comedian. But luckily, crippling self-doubt comes with the gift of keen self-examination. These essays deliver hilarious and incredibly insightful meditations on body image, productivity culture, the ultra-meme-ability of mental health language, and who, exactly, gets to make art &“about nothing.&” Despite her own arguments to the contrary, UNRELIABLE NARRATOR is undeniable proof that Aparna is a force—as a comedian and author alike—to be reckoned with.
Round Here and Over Yonder: A Front Porch Travel Guide by Two Progressive Hillbillies (Yes, that’s a thing.)
By Trae Crowder, Corey Ryan Forrester. 2023
Join Southern comedian duo Trae Crowder and Corey Ryan Forrester in this hilarious and irreverent travel guide as they wander…about ponderin' the peculiarities beyond their small-town front porches.Trae and Corey will take you from the smallest of small towns to major US metropolises (or is it metropoli? We haven't a fartin' clue!). They'll even cross the pond to sip tea in some of them fancy kings-and-castles places that PBS Viewers Like You can't stop yapping about. From Chickamauga to Cheyenne, New York to New Orleans, Seattle to Scotland—no matter where these two wandering jesters go, there's something to roast, something to toast, and something to learn about what ties us together as humans. Even the most outrageous of us.In this book you'll find:Loads of eccentric things folks say.Seriously well-informed tips on exactly where to eat and what to order in each city.Anecdotes from Corey about everything from "German Mardi Gras" in Helen, Georgia, to eatin' over-priced rabbit in Napa, California.Travel bingo boards and ad-libs for your own adventures.And as many off-the-beaten-path jokes as can be packed into 256 pages!Perfect for anyone who:Likes to travel.Loathes to travel.Any Southerner who's both a little proud and a little ashamed of the South (that's all the sane ones).Any Northerner, Midwesterner, or West Coaster who wants to know what two self-proclaimed rednecks have to say about their own hometown.Anyone from the UK who thinks us Yanks are the craziest folks on God's green earth (cause this book will likely confirm that stereotype, yup).
Shitty Craft Club is a uniquely empowering guide that allows burnt-out, pressured people to accept their imperfections and find inner…calm with whatever shitty thing they can make.Did you know that you are a glorious and incredible artist? Wait, really? Well, you are. Through silly and deeply relatable tales from her life, Sam Reece, founder of the Shitty Craft Club, guides you through dozens of craft projects that give you permission to be as weird, wild, and wonderful as you want to be. Melding the nihilistic spirit of millennial/Gen Z humor with Amy Sedaris's gonzo crafting style and a healthy dose of Lisa Frank vibes, the Shitty Craft Club proves there's no limit to what a craft can be. Making a bunch of pom-poms so you can be your own cheerleader? That's a craft. Sculpting a rhinestone shrimp out of aluminum foil and a glue gun? A craft. Having literally one sip of water (congrats, by the way)? Yup, you bet—a craft. Because life is hard. So why not spend a bit of time gluing some trash to more trash if it makes you happy?This is your sign to embrace anti-perfectionism. Join us at the Shitty Craft Club!SELF-ESTEEM OVER SELF-IMPROVEMENT: In times of uncertainty, we all need a little more self-compassion. Treat yourself with kindness and care. Shitty Craft Club gives us the tools to cope in a creative and fun way, without feeling the pressure to make everything perfect. A SHITTY PHENOMENON: From in-person events at the Ace Hotel and Milk Bar to viral projects on Instagram and TikTok, Sam Reece, the creator of Shitty Craft Club, has cultivated a movement that embraces the weird and wonderful over the perfect. This book captures all that magic of Shitty Craft Club (and hopefully inspires you to start your own). FOR FANS OF MAKING IT AND AT HOME WITH AMY SEDARIS: With projects like Rhinestone Wall Shrimp, the Corndle, and the Shitty Trophy, this book will inspire you to pick up a glue gun, buy a bucket of beads, and make your own strange and beautiful creations.Perfect for:Fans of Sam Reece and Shitty Craft ClubCrafters and DIY enthusiasts looking for a humorous take on creativitySelf-care and mindfulness practitionersFans of Making It, Nailed It!, and At Home with Amy SedarisCreative gift for Mother's Day, graduation, holidays, and birthday
By Brian Rea, Lucienne Brown. 2023
Giant fluffy honeybees, dad jokes from God, and a mountain of perplexing paperwork populate this illustrated book about an intern…in heaven who is determined to solve the world's least pressing problems.We all agree evolution is a good thing, but why does it have to take so bloody long? A few million years to go from fins to feet just isn't quick enough in this age of immediate software updates, drone deliveries, and canned whipped cream. People want change, and they want it NOW. Enter Abby, an intern assigned to Heaven's newly formed Updates Team. While The Boss takes care of the big stuff, Abby's tasked with reviewing hundreds of feedback forms from the recently deceased. Her job: to assess which suggestions should be put into production. Should humans have collapsible skeletons? How many ants does it take to carry a middle-aged woman to Costco? Are we ready to try self-generated meat? When she's not evaluating the wild but well-intentioned suggestions of disgruntled former denizens of Earth, Abby is dodging dad jokes from The Boss, learning about the past lives of her cubicle mates, and wondering if she made a good impression on Jonty from Emotional Engineering. And although her eager attitude and proactive working style is appreciated, she may have overstepped the mark with flamingos. . . Writer Lucienne Brown and award-winning artist Brian Rea tell Abby's story of successes, failures, and unfortunate mishaps, making Fixing Flamingos a witty tribute to the most relatable struggles of modern-day existence.UNIQUE PREMISE: This book offers an unexpected take on changing the world by imagining what happens when people play God. Fixing Flamingos is a simultaneously sweet and irreverent satire that blends the relatable humor of corporate bureaucracy and office drama with thoughtful perspectives on change, happiness, work, and growth. PITCH-PERFECT ART: Beloved artist Brian Rea is a master at wielding his restrained line art to evoke maximum expressiveness, humor, and relatability. In Fixing Flamingos, his signature drawing style perfectly captures the wacky suggestions in the story. FUN FOR EVERYONE: With its lovable narrator and amusing drawings, this book is a fun gift for lovers of indie graphic novels, speculative fiction readers, and fans of satirical send-ups like TV's The Office. Abby's earnest ruminations and workplace antics will delight anyone who needs a break from the stresses of modern living. Whether you like to ponder big ideas or chuckle over a good fart joke, this book will surprise and satisfy you from the first page to the last.Perfect for:Fans of Brian ReaSatirical comedy loversFans of office and workplace humorFans of comic strips, graphic novels, and zinesArt and illustration loversPeople who enjoy dark humor and tongue-in-cheek stories about the afterlifePast, present and future interns, or anyone who has been given a task well above their paygrade or experienceShoppers looking for a funny gift for recent graduates, coworkers, or managersFans of TV shows like The Good Place, The Office, and Miracle Workers
Uncle John's Fully Loaded: 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader (Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Annual #25)
By Bathroom Readers' Institute. 2012
Take a seat and settle in—it&’s a gigantic treasury of trivia and humor for our twenty-fifth (is that porcelain?) anniversary!…IBPA Benjamin Franklin Award Gold Winner in Humor ForeWord Reviews Book of the Year Awards, Honorable Mention in Humor &“Fully Loaded&” is putting it mildly. This behemoth of a book is overflowing with incredible stories, surprising facts, weird news, little-known origins, forgotten history, fun wordplay, and everything else that millions of loyal fans have come to expect from the world&’s best-selling bathroom reading series. As always, it&’s divided by length: quickies for the reader on the go, medium-sized articles for those with a few minutes to spare, and extra-long pieces for those truly leg-numbing experiences. Here are just a few of the hundreds of topics loaded into this edition of America&’s favorite source of fascinating information: * Forgotten Firsts * Dumb Crooks: Stoner Edition * Bizarre Japanese Video Games * The Kamikaze Instruction Manual * Our Lady of the Little Green Men * The Worst Fire in American History * The World&’s Worst Business Decision * The New Year&’s Eve Opossum Drop * Do Blondes Really Have More Fun? * Failed Doomsday Predictions * When Toilets Explode * and much, much more!
By Chicago Tribune. 2012
An entertaining treasury of tips, hacks, and step-by-step techniques to smooth your way through the world.How do you give a…good wedding toast? How do you fix a clogged drain? How do you bowl without hurting anyone? Questions like these—some highly practical, others wildly funny—make up this engaging do-it-yourself guide. Including illustrations and diagrams and compiled from the Chicago Tribune how-to column “Life Skills,” this book is filled with often-humorous instructions on performing a variety of tasks—from technical challenges to social interactions.sew a button • wrap a gift • shine your shoes • clean your keyboard • ask for a raise • give yourself a facial massage • flirt • pack for a road trip • turn down a request • teach someone to ride a bike • photograph a dog • change a tire • fix a faucet • load a moving truck • end a relationship • give a tip • choose an engagement ring • and more
Uncle John's Bathroom Reader: An Elevating Collection of Quick Facts and Incredible Curiosities (Uncle John's Bathroom Reader)
By Bathroom Readers' Institute. 2009
With this volume filled with thousands of bizarrely fascinating facts, we&’re on a roll! Is there any other single…book in the universe with this many awesome tidbits of bite-sized information? Nope. And that&’s a fact! At nearly 400 pages (with a handy index for your fact-seeking convenience), Wise Up! is a must-have for anyone who likes their information on the go. It&’s organized into hundreds of topics—everything from sports and entertainment to word origins and science. Here are but a few of the facts awaiting you: * More women than men talk to their cars. * The melody for Nat King Cole&’s 1954 hit &“Smile&” was composed by Charlie Chaplin. * Acid rain was first identified and named in 1852. * What is your buccal cavity? Your mouth. * There are no skunks in Newfoundland. * The average Super Bowl party has 18 people. * When dropped in water, a fresh egg will sink; a stale one won&’t. * The average newborn baby spends 113 minutes a day crying. * Pepper was so valuable during Elizabethan times that it was sold by the grain. * Fossilized termite farts have been preserved in amber. And thousands more!
By Tom Angleberger. 2019
Every famous piece of art has an origin story—even Bach’s Goldberg Variations! When the richest dude in town can’t sleep,…he hires a much-less-rich dude named Johann Gottlieb Goldberg to play him lullabies on the harpsichord. Goldberg does an OK job, but as the Rich Dude hollers for Goldberg each night, he wakes up the whole town in the process. As the town gets sleepier and sleepier and grumpier and grumpier, Goldberg worries he may be out of a job soon. But then, the one and only Bach enters the scene with a series of lullabies composed specifically for the Rich Dude. And, thus, the Goldberg Variations are born! This zany, nontraditional nonfiction picture book comes from the inimitable Tom Angleberger, author of the bestselling Origami Yoda series.
By Kitty Flanagan. 2020
&“Rule no. 1: Buy this book, laugh out loud, become a better person.&” —Jason Alexander 488 Rules for Life is not…a self-help book, because it&’s not you who needs help—it&’s other people. Whether they&’re walking and texting, asphyxiating you on public transport with their noxious perfume cloud, or leaving one useless square of toilet paper on the roll, people just don&’t know the rules. But now, thanks to Australian comedian Kitty Flanagan&’s comprehensive guide to modern behavior, our world will soon be a much better place. A place where people don&’t ruin the fruit salad by putting banana in it . . . where your co-workers refrain from reheating their fish curry in the office microwave . . . where middle-aged men don&’t have ponytails. What started as a joke on Kitty Flanagan&’s popular segment on ABC-TV&’s The Weekly is now a quintessential reference book with the power to change society. (Or, at least, make it a bit less irritating.)
By Chris Wood. 2021
One last thing before I go . . . True stories of doomed figures from British history—and what they announced to the world…as the Grim Reaper drew near. Nothing focuses the mind more starkly than impending death. In this book, you can mount the scaffold and share in the final utterings of the condemned, and join the stricken in their deathbeds as their deeply entrenched secrets are finally unshackled. Famous Last Words collects a fascinating selection of destinies, culminating in their often flamboyant, always captivating comments just before they shuffled off this mortal coil. Revealed inside are tales of sangfroid bravery, astonishing ironies, and overdue confessions often betraying grave miscarriages of justice. Writer and poet Sir Walter Raleigh had some typically forthright and goading words for his executioner as the hesitant axeman displayed fear and reluctance to perform his stately duties. The final words of convicted murderer Ernest Brown may have been a candid confession to another killing he had committed deep in the Northumberland Moors some two years previously. And what of Britain&’s first actor to have had a knighthood bestowed upon him? Discover the staggering irony that saw his final words on stage prophetically turn out to be his last in life . . .
By Bradley Trevor Greive. 2010
From a New York Times bestselling author, a humorous look at the advantages of being a dog parent, with photos…from an award-winning photographer.Some pairings are just meant to be: peanut butter and chocolate, yin and yang, Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers. So it was only a matter of time before the stars in the universe lined up and suggested the collaboration between New York Times bestselling author Bradley Trevor Greive and award-winning photographer Rachael Hale. Greive and Hale explain once and for all Why Dogs Are Better Than Cats. Now, before all you cat lovers find your fur standing on end, Greive is quick to stress that he is simply “prodog, not anticat. The purpose of this book is not to criticize cats or their owners, but to champion the many exceptional virtues unique to dogs.”What are these unique attributes that make canine companions superior to their feline fiends? (Oops, we meant friends.) Consider the following:* Dogs are social. Cats are sociopaths.* Dogs match up to people. People must match up to cats.* Dogs teach us patience. Cats test our patience.* Dogs give and give. Cats are the gift that keeps on grifting.The bottom line is this: Dogs want love. Cats want fish.Although Greive admits that there is something to be said for “soft, warm, and sleepy” (a.k.a. cats) as captured in Hale's cuddly feline photographs, he concludes that dogs would be the only ones with character enough to admit this fact, thereby once again positioning themselves as the superior pet, confidant, admirer, and friend.
An eclectic collection from Roy Blount Jr., master of American humor writingI&’ll tell you what kind of book I believe…in: one that makes people say, at first sight, what the first person who ever saw a camel must have said: &“What in the world is that?&” And then, after a while, &“Yet it seems to fit together some way.&”In this laugh-a-minute assortment of essays, travel writing, poems, and even the occasional crossword puzzle, Roy Blount Jr. covers sixty-four different subjects, all unified by his trademark humor. &“Tan&” is a personal essay about Blount&’s lifelong battle with—sometimes for and sometimes against—that elusive summer glow. &“Wild Fish Ripped My Flesh&” chronicles his misadventures navigating the Amazon River. And &“Lit Demystified Quickly&” is a tongue-in-cheek poem about larger-than-life literary figures such as James Joyce, William Faulkner, and Walt Whitman.Camels Are Easy, Comedy&’s Hard is a classic compendium of the wisecracks and wisdom for which Blount is renowned.
By Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr. 2019
Keep your family cracking up—500+ knock-knock jokes for kids ages 6 to 12 Welcome to A Whole Lotta Knock Knock…Jokes—a new collection of rib-tickling knock-knock jokes for kids. It's endless fun to keep friends, family—even grandma!—giggling for hours. These pages are packed with over 500 squeaky-clean knock-knock jokes for kids about animals, food, fun places, and beyond. Dazzle your family and friends on long car rides, family vacations, and after school. There's even a riddle hidden inside, too! Knock Knock Who's there? Gopher Gopher who? Gopher it! You can do it! This awesome book of knock-knock jokes for kids includes: Jokes galore—Behold! A great companion for budding comedians. Brain-teasing surprise—Solve the hidden riddle inside! Easy to read—It's a nonstop reading adventure—perfect for all grade levels. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's A Whole Lotta Knock Knock Jokes for kids!