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Showing 11581 - 11600 of 11766 items
By Jonathan Sayer. 2023
‘Captures the illogical romance of the sport’ NEW STATESMANEver wondered what it would be like to run your local football…
club?On the second oldest football pitch in the world, Jonathan Sayer stands atop a beer crate to address the assembled fans. As his initial optimism begins to slip through his fingers, the new chairman of Ashton United starts to realize the scale of the challenge ahead.With a fan-led mutiny on his hands, a star striker on crutches, and a record number of games without a win, Jonathan is forced to make a series of increasingly desperate decisions – from sinking his life savings into an ever-spiralling wage bill to inviting a local priest to perform a late-night exorcism on the pitch.Chronicling the euphoric highs and bitter disappointments of the less glamourous side of the beautiful game, Nowhere to Run is the hilarious, heart-warming tale of life in the hot seat of a non-league football club.‘A glorious chronicle of memorable highs, bitter disappointments and never-ending bills’MIRRORBy Tim Vine. 2011
Comedian and TV star, Tim Vine, will have you laughing for hours with this new, abridged version of his hilarious…
joke book . . .Velcro.What a rip off.Why do you never see an elephant on a bus? Because he's got a massive bum.So I went to the doctors. I said, 'I got hurt in a pillow fight.' He said, 'You've got concushion.'Believe it or not there are twice as many eyebrows in the world as there are peopleI tried to surf the Internet and I fell off my chairRead it to find these funny puns, plus many more original jokes and illustrations. You won't be able to put it down!By Chas Newkey-Burden, Julie Burchill. 2008
It is a great and glorious tradition the world over - to vehemently state one thing and then do the…
exact opposite. Royals are doing it, reformed smokers are doing it, and politicians are virtually synonymous with it. Welcome to the heyday of hypocrisy.From the Everyday Hypocrites (cyclists, white hip-hop fans, reality television-haters) to the truly pungent Stinking Hypocrites (chav-haters, green campaigners and anti-Americans), Julie Burchill and Chas Newkey-Burden pull no punches in their witty harangue of those who shamelessly say one thing and do another. Features the modern hypocrite's favourite holiday destinations, sporting heroes and the hilarious Hypocrites' Ultimate Weekend.By Nicholas Lezard. 2012
Nicholas Lezard loved London. Then the London 2012 Olympics came along ...Suddenly his beloved city was invaded by über-people in…
branded sportswear who had contorted their bodies into odd shapes in order to run a bit faster, or throw things a bit further. Not to mention armies of reptilian brand-managers, chancers and corporate cheerleaders all wanting to cash in, as a blameless piece of the East End was turned (at tear-inducing cost) into one huge folly.In The Nolympics Nicholas Lezard gives us the perfect antidote to Olympics fever with a hilarious blow-by-blow account of how he survived its highs and lows, triumphs and soul-destroying boredom. It is a book for anyone who would rather sit in the dark watching TV than ever wave a flag, who was last to be picked for PE, or who just feels that somewhere along the way the Spirit of the Games was smothered by wads of money. It is the only Olympic souvenir you'll ever need.By Laura Belbin. 2022
Shame, shame we know your nameDo we own it? Being a woman that is. Do we fuck! We live in…
fear of how we look, what we eat, how we age and what we do. Wow, it's 2022 and we're still churning out that same old shit. I've been told as you get older you care less. Fucking great. I can't wait to be menopausal with skunk-like grey track lines in my hair, saggier tits, and miserable as shit. I don't know about you, but I'd quite like to have that experience - the no-fucks-experience that is - now, before that all happens. To have the confidence to believe in who I am. It's a push we all have to make - whether it be in our confidence over our bodies, who we are as people, or what goes on inside our mind - and we all have to work at it. It's baby steps. So let's take it back to those tiny steps, because all mountains that are climbed don't happen without practice, perseverance, self-belief and a fuck ton of work.By Ruth Dudley Edwards. 2003
They were 'Cudlipp' and 'Mr King' when they met in 1935. At 21, gregarious, extrovert and irreverent Hugh Cudlipp had…
many years of journalistic experience: at 34, shy, introspective and solemn Cecil Harmsworth King, haunted by the ghost of Uncle Alfred, Lord Northcliffe, the great press magnate, and bitter towards Uncle Harold, Lord Rothermere of the Daily Mail, was fighting his way up in the family business. Opposites in most respects, they were complementary in talents and had in common a deep concern for the underdog. Cudlipp, the journalistic genius, and King, the formidable intellect, were to become, in Cudlipp's words, 'the Barnum and Bailey' of Fleet Street. Together, on the foundation of the populist Daily Mirror, they created the biggest publishing empire in the world. Yet their relationship foundered sensationally in 1968, when - as King tried to topple the Prime Minister - Cudlipp toppled King. Through the story of two extraordinary men, Ruth Dudley Edwards gives us a riveting portrait of Fleet Street in its heyday.By Bill Bailey. 2016
'When herons are spooked they have a habit of vomiting as a defence. Half-digested pieces of eel and water vole…
skull on your head is not a good look. Just so you know.'Bill Bailey's Remarkable Guide to British Birds is all about comedian Bailey's love of birds. A visual feast - it is packed with illustrations, sketches and notes by Bailey - as well as informative, it is funny and insightful, and positively crackles with energy, knowledge and wit as he takes us on a journey around the British isles, zooming in on those birds that enthuse him the most. Whether it's what they eat, where they fly to or how they communicate, these birds are always fascinating, and Bailey introduces us to their weird and wonderful ways in a manner that is always entertaining. If you're a parent who'd like to appear a bit clever when your child asks you the name of a bird; if you want to find a new and healthy hobby that takes you outdoors; or whether, quite simply, you want to understand a bit more about our natural environment and have a laugh at the same time, this is the perfect companion book to have.Alongside music and stand-up, one of Bailey's favourite pastimes is birdwatching, which he has been doing since he was a child in the West Country. His fondest memories are of family outings with parents, grandparents and cousins, ticking the birds off in his little Observer's Book of Birds. As he has said about those formative years, 'birdwatching gave a purpose to the day and a love of the natural world which has carried on into my adult life'. A beautifully and originally designed hardback, it will delight Bailey's fans as well as those who like a bit of armchair escapism.By B. J. Lovegood. 2023
Have you ever been ensnared by a Scorpio? Ghosted by a Gemini? Catfished by a Cancer? Well dear reader, this…
is the book for you. Strap in as Astrologer B.J. Lovegood takes you on a journey through the galaxy where you'll learn how to dodge red flags and avoid dating disasters.Never Shag a Scorpio is an amorous adventure through the zodiac. Funny, smutty and embarrassingly accurate, it will teach you how to lure a Leo, turn on a Taurus and impress a Pisces' parents.Complete with full romantic profiles for each star sign and hilarious and handy listicles such as 'Top 5 places to have sex with a Sagittarius' and 'A Taurus's top 5 breakup songs', this book is your go-to guide to navigating the steamy side of astrology.By Griff Rhys Jones. 1983
This wonderful anthology contains some of the nation's all-time favourite comic poetry. From much-loved classics such as Lewis Carroll's curious…
'Jabberwocky' to lesser known and forgotten gems such as Gelett Burgess's 'The Purple Cow', Griff Rhys Jones takes us on a poetic tour of witty, nonsensical and plain laugh-out-loud funny poems. The selection brings together poets from every age and every walk of life, from Shakespeare to Victoria Wood and from Keats to Benjamin Zephaniah. There is Roald Dahl's cunning variation on 'Little Red Riding Hood', Spike Milligan's brilliantly ridiculous 'On the Ning Nang Nong' as well as several entries from the ever-elusive Anon, including one delightfully succint 'Peas'. Remembered, half-remembered, cherished or written on a tea towel, here are some of the nation's favourite comic poems.By Alan Davies. 2009
Alan Davies was always a hoarder. Pages from Smash Hits, rolled up gig posters, Cup Final ticket stubs, Woody Allen…
paperbacks, NME covers and Blondie calendars filled boxes once used to ferry shopping home from supermarkets (back when supermarkets would leave boxes out for the ferrying of shopping). Not much that came down from Alan's bedroom wall made it into the bin, never mind the uninvented bin-liner.Growing up is not easy. So many decisions: Who to revere, Sheene or McEnroe? Who to imitate, Starsky or Hutch? Who to dislike overnight in an effort to show maturity, Thatcher or Scargill? How to decide which pin-ups to unpin when a batch of Animal Rights leaflets or a satirical poster of Ronald Reagan demand wallspace?The Impressionable Age of a young man lasts around a decade and the idols and icons of that period can reveal much of the time and of the impressed subject.Nostalgic, warm and laugh-out-loud funny My Favourite People and Me 1978-1988 is an affectionate trip through a suburban childhood in Essex and an eighties education in Kent. As Alan says, 'an attempt to remember who and what I liked as a boy/youth/idiot and to work out why. There are also some pictures.'By Jeremy Hardy. 2010
When Jeremy Hardy decided to explore his ancestry it was, in part, to get to the bottom of his grandmother…
Rebecca's dubious claims that the family descended from a certain 17th-century architect and that, more recently, Jeremy's great-grandfather was a Royal bodyguard. Other legends ranged from the great aunt who ran illegal hooch during Prohibition to the wronged Victorian servant girl who bore an illegitimate Hardy, not forgetting the family's rightful claim to a large country estate. Wild stories aside, Jeremy sets out to such diverse locations as the Croydon one-way system and the hostile waters around Malta in order to find traces of recognisable family traits and a sense of how he came to be. With wry humour and a keen eye for the absurd and the frustrating, Jeremy takes us on a by turns funny and moving journey into the world of family ancestry. My Family and Other Strangers will be enjoyed by anyone who has tried to decipher the 1901 census records, or simply wishes they too had asked their grandparents more about their lives.By Brendan O'Carroll. 2013
Uncover hilarious and unique insights into the Brown family, in Brendan O'Carroll's first official book on his NTA winning comic…
creation Mrs Brown's Boys.Millions od us have wondered: how does Agnes Brown do it? Keeping her end up while seven grown-up children tear about the fecking place like the eejits don't have a home to go to.Packed with Mammy's tips for keeping a perfect family - or at least, just a family - as well as contributions from her children, neighbours and other hangers on, Mrs Brown's Family Handbook dispenses endless advice in her fecking fantastic style.You'll learn: Why every mammy's secret weapon is the tea towel The dos and don'ts of cleaning up Granddad What Dermot doesn't know about farting (not much) What Winnie knows about seks (not enough) All about the Five-Sausages-A-Day Diet (hint: contains sausages) From Maria, all about pain relief in child birth (if it's free, fecking take it)The must-have gift for any Mrs Brown fan, Mrs Brown's Family Handbook is perfect for equally large and chaotic families, or those in small families curious about what they're missing...Brendan O'Carroll is an Irish writer, producer, comedian, actor, director and author. He is best known for playing Agnes Brown in Mrs Brown's Boys, which won the best sitcom BAFTA in 2012 and best comedy at the National Television Awards 2020. He has written four films and nine comedy shows, including The Course (1995) and The Last Wedding (1999). He has also published seven novels, including The Mammy, The Scrapper and The Young Wan - a number of which have been translated into 12 languages.By Jeremy Clarkson. 2004
Jeremy Clarkson invites us to Motorworld, his take on different cultures and the cars that they drive.There are ways and…
means of getting about that don't involve four wheels, but in this slice of vintage Clarkson, Jeremy isn't much interested in them.Back in 1996, he took himself off to twelve countries (okay, eleven - he goes to America twice) in search of the hows, whys and wherefores of different nationalities and their relationships with cars. There were a few questions he needed answers to:* Why, for instance, is it that Italians are more interested in looking good than looking where they are going?* Why do Indians crash a lot?* How can an Arab describe himself as 'not a rich man' with four of the world's most expensive cars in his drive? * And why have the otherwise neutral Swiss declared war on the car?From Cuba to Iceland, Australia to Vietnam, Japan to Texas, Jeremy Clarkson tells us of his adventures on and off four wheels as he seeks to discover just what it is that makes our motorworld tick over. _____________Praise for Jeremy Clarkson:'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening StandardBy Richard Topping. 2007
Have you ever wanted to be a lumberjack? Had trouble with a dead parrot? Or gone for a silly walk?Combining…
outrageous humour, unbridled creativity and surreal animation, John Cleese, Michael Palin, Graham Chapman, Terry Gilliam, Terry Jones and Eric Idle entertained millions and inspired generations of future comedians. Including all Monty Python material ever produced, from the Flying Circus to the Life of Brian to Spamalot! with biographies, programme guides and a filmography, this is a must-have plethora of Pythonism and a fitting tribute to comedic pioneers.By Spike Milligan. 1976
VOLUME THREE OF SPIKE MILLIGAN'S LEGENDARY MEMOIRS IS A HILARIOUS, SUBVERSIVE FIRST-HAND ACCOUNT OF WW2'The most irreverent, hilarious book about…
the war that I have ever read' Sunday Express 'Brilliant verbal pyrotechnics, throwaway lines and marvelous anecdotes' Daily Mail ______________ 'It's all over, Von Arnheim has surrendered and he's very angry.' 'This could mean war . . .' The third volume of Spike Milligan's laugh-a-line account of life as a gunner in World War Two resumes on the eve of victory in North Africa. Now Britain's looniest war hero must combat some of the direst threats a soldier has ever faced - boredom ('Christ, I just thought of Catford'), moving camp ('It's a sort of Brighton with camels'), moving camp again ('We're already somewhere else'), a visit to Carthage ('It's terrible, it's like Catford') and a perilous encounter with the gloriously endowed Mademoiselle Villion ('"Help! massage," I said weakly').Against the odds, they survive and are sent at last to Italy to be killed...______________ 'That absolutely glorious way of looking at things differently. A great man' Stephen Fry 'The Godfather of Alternative Comedy' Eddie Izzard 'Manifestly a genius, a comic surrealist genius and had no equal' Terry Wogan 'A totally original comedy writer' Michael Palin 'Close in stature to Lewis Carroll and Edward Lear in his command of the profound art of nonsense' GuardianBy Dan McCrum. 2022
'The financial investigation of the decade... Money Men instantly enters the canon of great financial crime books' Bradley Hope, author…
of The Billion Dollar Whale'A rip-roaring ride into the underworld of the global economy' Tom Burgis, author of Kleptopia'Required reading' The Economist'A cross between the Enron scandal and Rosemary's Baby' John Lanchester, London Review of Books'Reads like a crime drama' New Statesman'The culmination of years of careful investigative work... Gripping' Evening Standard'A thrilling, head-spinning book' Irish Times'A rollercoaster read that reveals everything that's wrong with our financial system' Catherine BeltonNow adapted as the Netflix documentary Skandal!, this is the stranger-than-fiction story of Wirecard, once a $30 billion tech darling, now a smouldering wreck, by the journalist who brought it crashing down - perfect for those who loved Bad Blood and Empire of Pain.When journalist Dan McCrum followed a tip to investigate the hot new tech company challenging Silicon Valley, everything about Wirecard looked a little too good to be true: offices were sprouting up around the world, it was reporting runaway growth and the CEO even wore a black turtleneck in tribute to Steve Jobs. In the space of a few short years, the company had come from nowhere to overtake industry giants like Commerzbank and Deutsche Bank on the stock market.As McCrum dug deeper, he encountered a story stranger and more dangerous than he ever imagined: a world of short sellers and whistleblowers, pornographers and private militias, hackers and spies. Before long he realised that he wasn't the only one in pursuit. Shadowy figures were following him through the streets of London, high-flying lawyers were sending ominous letters to his boss, and he was named as the prime suspect in a criminal inquiry. The race was on to prove his suspicions and clear his name.Money Men is the astonishing true story of Wirecard's multi-billion-dollar fraud, Europe's biggest new tech darling revealed as a house of cards.Uncovering fake bank accounts, fake offices and possibly even a fake death, McCrum offers a searing exposé that will finally lay bare the truth.By Richard Horne. 2013
Tired of the dull daily commute to the office, the tedious traipse to and from the school gates? Fed up…
with the seemingly endless shades of grey that decorate the canvas of modern life? Then the time has come to open your eyes!For in the midst of those soulless sceneries and vacant vistas there lies a wealth of fascinating detail. Look up! Look carefully all around! Where once there was monotony, now there is intrigue in abundance; sights and sounds sure to delight and amuse, amaze and entertain, to brighten each and every day - for once you spot, you can’t stop.The Modern Day Spotter’s Guide brings together the fun and frustrating, the maddening and the mundane, the good, the bad and the ugly to offer you a list of unlikely things to spot on your daily trudge through life. So be sure to keep your eyes peeled: for whether it be a cat with a moustache, a hopelessly lost tourist, a pigeon with one foot, an embarrassing wardrobe malfunction or the face of Jesus in your soup, the world is waiting to be spotted. See things a little differently. And, remember, life is in the details – don’t let them pass you by.By Rhonda Yearn. 2020
Shag yourself zen.Release all stress with 60 calmer-sutra sexercises and meditations.With easy-to-follow instructional diagrams, and memorable mantras, this book will…
show you how to achieve inner peace, the fun way. Redirect your energy, master the power of intention. Inhale. Exhale, Cooooooohm.By Spike Milligan. 2012
Spike Milligan's legendary war memoirs are a hilarious and subversive first-hand account of the Second World War, as well as…
a fascinating portrait of the formative years of this towering comic genius, most famous as writer and star of The Goon Show. They have sold over 4.5 million copies.With his lightning-quick wit, unbridled creativity and his ear for the absurd, Milligan revolutionised British comedy, leaving a legacy of influence that stretches from Monty Python's Flying Circus to the work of self-confessed acolytes such as Eddie Izzard and Stephen Fry today.Throughout his life, Milligan wrote prolifically - scripts, poetry, fiction, as well as several volumes of memoir, in which he took an entirely idiosyncratic approach to the truth. In this ground-breaking work, Norma Farnes, his long-time manager, companion, counsellor and confidante, gathers together the loose threads, reads between the lines and draws on the full breadth of his writing to present his life in his own words: an autobiography - of sorts.From his childhood in India, through his early career as a jazz musician and sketch-show entertainer, his spells in North Africa and Italy with the Royal Artillery, to that fateful first broadcast of The Goon Show and beyond into the annals of comedy history, this is the autobiography Milligan never wrote.By Matt Cooper. 2018
Financial Times Business Book of the MonthSeptember 2017. Ryanair cancels over 700,000 bookings and its powerful PR juggernaut comes shuddering…
to a halt. For once, the airline's aggressive and flamboyant CEO, Michael O'Leary, is contrite and apologetic.A month later Ryanair announces increased passenger traffic for October, year-on-year growth and increased profits. Its share price soars. For the moment, it appears, a fundamental shake-up of Europe's biggest airline is off the table. But questions remain about the causes of the debacle and O'Leary's role in it.Michael O'Leary lifts the veil on the wildly successful and wildly controversial Ryanair CEO. Based on extensive research - including with close associates of O'Leary - the book examines O'Leary's personality, beliefs and obsessions and describes how these have moulded the business he runs. Written by a multi-award-winning journalist and broadcaster, with a thirty-year career covering business and current affairs, it is a fascinating insight into the business behind the man, and the man behind the business.'Fascinating book ... very comprehensive' Eamon Dunphy, The Stand'An indispensable guide for anyone who wants to understand not just where Michael O'Leary and Ryanair are coming from, but where they are going.' Sunday Business Post'A frequently enlightening unauthorised biography ... entertaining' Irish Independent'In a world of colourless corporate leaders, Ryanair's aggressive, mouthy chief executive provides catnip for journalists. Cooper, an award-winning Irish writer and reporter, makes the most of the opportunity to dissect his colourful subject' Book of the Month, The Financial Times