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Bible Tales for Ages 18 and Up
By G. Richard Bozarth. 2014
In 1947, Dr. Sebaceous Piafraus discovered the Terminally Ill Sea Scrolls in the same month the Dead Sea Scrolls were…
found. The Dead Sea Scrolls became internationally famous, but the Terminally Ill Sea Scrolls were consigned to obscurity, along with their discoverer. Dr. Piafraus, who endured decades of ego-bruising neglect, provides translations of well-known Old Testament stories, which he insists are the most authentic versions of the stories because the Jewish eschatological cult that created the Scrolls claimed that they were. These stories are more fully developed than in the Old Testament and are humorous, though some parts are appalling, because Bible stories often are appalling.Novelists
By C. P. Boyko. 2014
Novelists: the soul of an age, certainly. Brilliant? Perhaps. Yet aren't they also doddering, petulant, pedantic, knockkneed, skittish, and thunderingly…
insecure-resentful, awkward, annoying-demanding, deluded, and vexingly indifferent to reality? New from short fiction devotée C.P. Boyko, Novelists is a comedy of manners (and manuscripts), rivalling Vanity Fair for its satirical wit... though not, mercifully, for its length.To Be or Not To Be: A Chooseable-Path Adventure
By Ryan North. 2013
The greatest work in English literature, now in the greatest format of English literature: a chooseable-path adventure! When Shakespeare wrote…
Hamlet he gave the world just one possible storyline, drawn from a constellation of billions of alternate narratives. And now you can correct that horrible mistake! Play as Hamlet and avenge your father's death--with ruthless efficiency this time. Play as Ophelia and change the world with your scientific brilliance. Play as Hamlet's father and die on the first page, then investigate your own murder... as a ghost! Featuring over 100 different endings, each illustrated by today's greatest artists, incredible side quests, fun puzzles, and a book-within-a-book instead of a play-within-a-play, To Be or Not To Be offers up new surprises and secrets every time you read it.You decide this all sounds extremely excellent, and that you will definitely purchase this book right away. Because as the Bard said: "to be or not to be... that is the adventure."...You're almost certain that's how it goes.To Be or Not To Be originally launched as a record-breaking Kickstarter project. This new, reader-friendly edition features the same text and illustrations as the original version, redesigned to take up half as many pages and weigh a whole pound less.A Bundle of Neurotica: Eight Neurotica Short Stories (Neurotica)
By D. B. Shuster. 2015
"A wicked romp through the hallowed halls of academia!"Laugh out loud at these clever and sexy tales. Academia has never…
been so naughty!The university men in Professor Melanie Stevenson's life pressure her to take her proper place--under them. While the proper professor indulges in daring daydreams of...submitting to their will, her "evil" twin, Violet, takes on the role of academic avenger and cracks the whip, so to speak, to work out the kinks in higher education. Written by a college professor, this witty series takes a darkly funny look at the neurotic people and politics of higher education. These eight consecutive short stories tell a larger tale with rich characters, escalating stakes, and steamy action. What Readers are Saying"Timid Professors, evil twins and a good dose of slightly naughty will have you chuckling over the office water cooler.""Love this series! Smart, funny, and sexy. Great brain candy!""Hot and hillarious!""These are awesome. They're over the top enough to be funny but really, really good."Excerpt from "Spanking the Chair""Spanked?" he repeated, his voice cracking. She licked her lips and nodded, knowing she had his full interest now."Yes, spanked." She coiled a lock of hair around her finger, looked down at her own knees. "You know, sometimes I miss that.""You miss being spanked?""It was so cathartic, you know? A hot hand on my backside, a good wallop, and all the bad was purged out of me. I'd done my penance and could go back to being good again." "I don't know what to say," he said. Perhaps not, but his thoughts broadcast loud and clear, as he undressed her with his eyes and likely imagined turning her over his knee. So not going to happen."Do you feel you need to be punished for what you've done?" he asked."I know corporal punishment is out of vogue," she said. "But truly, it could be so therapeutic." His head bounced like a bobble head as he communicated his willingness to give her what he most desired, him in the role of punisher.Time to change the game.She crossed her legs, leaned forward, and dropped her voice to a husky whisper. "Have you ever been spanked, Simon?"Encyclopaedia of Hell
By Mahendra Singh, Tony Millionaire, Martin Olson. 2011
A tour de force of darkness, Encyclopaedia of Hell is a manual of Earth written by Lord Satan for his…
invading hordes of demons, complete with hundreds of unpleasant illustrations, diagrams, and a comprehensive and utterly repulsive dictionary of Earth terms.Since the customs and mores of humanity are alien and inconceivable to demons, Satan wrote this strangely poetic military handbook for the enlightenment and edification of his demon armies. A masterpiece expressing Satan's hatred for humanity and himself, the Encyclopaedia includes "Techniques of Stalking and Eating Humans," "Methods of Canning Human Pus," and "Dicing and Slicing Orphaned Children."Why the invasion? During the last century in particular, Hell has become seriously overcrowded. Satan needs more land mass for the damned and to use the human livestock to feed his hungry demon invaders.Since this book is the 666th commemorative edition, this Encyclopaedia contains special commemorative material.Martin Olson's savage wit provides the firepower for a preposterous literary feat unaccomplished since Mark Twain passed-channeling the real voice of Satan. Over the past fifteen years, Olson has written and produced nine comedy specials, inflicted on the populace via CBS, HBO, Showtime, Cinemax, and A&E.The Possum That Didn't
By Frank Tashlin. 1977
There once was a happy little possum, the happiest animal in the entire forest, who always wore a great big…
smile. This jolly creature was content simply to hang by his tail from a tree until he was discovered by a group of picnickers. Mistaking the possum's upside-down smile for a frown, the people resolve to rescue him ― and they turn the little possum's world topsy-turvy. Strikingly illustrated in black-and-white, this memorable satire of cultural intolerance was created by Frank Tashlin, the famed animator, film director, and author of The Bear That Wasn't. Readers of all ages will appreciate the book's message as well as its distinctive drawings.From the #1 bestselling author of Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids comes a brand-new joke collection with hundreds of spooky knee-slappers…
to make you cackle about monsters, mayhem, and more.Rob Elliott's irresistible comedic genius returns to make your little ghosts and goblins laugh with nonstop puns, jokes, and other absurdities about everything that goes bump in the night. This refreshing classic is a perfect fit for the entire family to enjoy together!How does a monster like his coffee? With scream and sugar!Learn about machines the fun way! The Magic School Bus meets The Way Things Work in this kid-friendly guide to…
understanding the basics of simple machines, perfect for budding engineers. The Invention Hunters travel the globe in their flying museum collecting the world's greatest inventions! Today they've landed in a construction zone. These silly scientists think they've stumbled on incredible specimens of everything you'd never find at a building site, from roller skates and pogo sticks to swords and race cars. But what they really discover--with a kid as their guide--is how simple machines like pulleys, cranks, and levers are used to engineer tools ranging from jackhammers to dump trucks...and even toilets!Using simple explanations and diagrams and a heaping helping of humor, the Invention Hunters make the perfect companions for curious kids who are ready to learn about science, physics, engineering, history, and more.The Invention Hunters Discover How Electricity Works (The Invention Hunters #2)
By Korwin Briggs. 2019
Learn about electricity the fun way! The Magic School Bus meets The Way Things Work in this kid-friendly guide to…
understanding the basics of electricity, perfect for budding engineers. The Invention Hunters travel the globe in their flying museum collecting the world's greatest inventions! This time, they've landed in a kid's backyard, and these silly scientists think they've stumbled on incredible specimens, from umbrellas and lipsticks to coins and rockets. But what they really discover--with a kid as their guide--is how electricity and magnetism powers lamps, batteries, and even toasters!Using simple explanations and diagrams and a heaping helping of humor, the Invention Hunters make the perfect companions for curious kids who are ready to learn about science, physics, engineering, history, and more.Does It Fart?: A Kid's Guide to the Gas Animals Pass
By Nick Caruso, Dani Rabaiotti, Alex G. Griffiths. 2019
A hilariously informative book of facts, farts, and fun!Dogs fart. Cats fart. Horses fart (a lot). But what about snakes?…
Spiders? Octopuses? What about chimpanzees? Cheetahs? Or dinosaurs?In this gaseous guide to kids' favorite animals (and some they've probably never heard of), young readers will discover not only which animals pass gas, but also which have the stinkiest farts, which fart the most, and where all this smelly stuff comes from. They'll even learn which species has its own secret fart code! Perfect for reluctant readers, and with full-color illustrations throughout, Does It Fart? is the funniest book you never knew you needed.Based on the New York Times bestseller Does It Fart?: The Definitive Field Guide to Animal Flatulence.The Truth About My Unbelievable Summer . . .
By Benjamin Chaud, Davide Cali. 2016
What really happened over the summer break? A curious teacher wants to know. The epic explanation? What started out as…
a day at the beach turned into a globe-spanning treasure hunt with high-flying hijinks, exotic detours, an outrageous cast of characters, and one very mischievous bird! Is this yet another tall tale, or is the truth just waiting to be revealed? From the team behind I Didn't Do My Homework Because . . . and A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to School . . . comes a fantastical fast-paced, detail-rich illustrated summer adventure that's so unbelievable, it just might be true! Plus, this is the fixed-format version, which looks almost identical to the print edition.The Best of Matt 2019
By Matt Pritchett. 2019
Whether you want to laugh or cry about the last twelve months, Matt gives a brilliantly funny take on the…
world. From Brexit to business, Trump to transport woes, our obsession with the weather to Royal babies, Matt nails it every single time with just the right visual joke. There is no doubt: Matt definitely makes the world a happier place!Tales from the Brothers Grimm and the Sisters Weird
By Vivian Vande Velde. 2005
The Va Dinci Cod
By Adam Roberts. 2005
Something fishy is going on in the world of artistic scholarship. How can there possibly be a link between the…
hidden cod of Leonardo Da Vinci's paintings and the over fishing of the North Atlantic fish stocks? Could it be that Leonardo Da Vinci, the greatest genius of his age and inventor of the photocopier and mouse mat, had a chilling insight into European Union Fishing policies.Only one man can find out. Robert Hangdog, international scholar, master spy and action hero. Oh and Bezu Fish.Secrets of a Schoolyard Millionaire
By Nat Amoore. 2021
&‘Laughs, family, friendships and a thrilling adventure – Secrets of a Schoolyard Millionaire has it all.&’ Jen Carney, author of…
The Accidental Diary of B.U.G. &‘Fast-paced, clever and completely hilarious with the BEST cast of characters... LOVE IT TO BITS.&’ Rashmi Sirdeshpande, author of Dosh Finding a million dollars in your back garden – every kid&’s dream, right? That&’s what me and my best friend Toby thought too. Bouncy castles at school. Sweets for our adoring fans. Wearing sunglasses indoors (&’cos that&’s what all the millionaires do). There&’s a lot you can get with a million dollars . . . including a whole lot of trouble. Bonus tips on how to be a schoolyard millionaire inside!Matt on Brexit
By Matt Pritchett. 2019
'However bad the day's news, there'll still be a Matt cartoon the morning after, and we'll still laugh - he's…
a genius!' Jeremy Vine'Always topical and achingly funny' Jilly CooperFrom the (some say ill-judged) Referendum to the Remain and Leave campaigns with all their twists and turns ... From a vote of No Confidence to the ongoing confusion ... Matt hits the spot every time. Brilliantly entertaining, award-winning Matt can lighten even the most troubling times, and find the perfect cartoon to make the nation smile.Moving Foreword: Real Introductions to Totally Made-Up Books
By Jon Chattman. 2019
A great foreword is more than just a few pages of self-indulgent frippery that comes before a book. A great…
foreword adds zest. It sets the stage for the page turner you're about to open, and perhaps even puts you in the locked room where a mystery happens or in the high-button shoes of a year gone by. A great foreword—sometimes—is even better than the book it precedes. So why not skip the boring actual-book part? Moving Foreword is a collection of introductions to imaginary books, written by real celebrities, comedians, musicians, and other writers with something to say. With a real foreword by Rainn Wilson, this book offers a no-holds-barred cacophony of laugh-out-loud funny, poignant, and thought-provoking writing that tackles everything from politics to pop culture, true crime to trout fishing, and Star Wars to skin flicks. Highlights include: • Bustin' Through: Confessions of a Kool-Aid Man Foreword by "Pop Candy" columnist Whitney Matheson • Phil Rosenthal's Who's the Boss?: My Unlikely Rise to Rock Stardom Foreword by "Bruce Springsteen" (Phil Rosenthal) • Keep Your Gaze on Me: A True Story of Social Media, Obsession, and Murder Foreword by Shirley Manson, lead vocalist of Garbage • Sock Puppet Mozart: The Life and Gruesome Death of Randy Masterson Foreword by actor Thomas Lennon • Vance DeGeneris: An Unauthorized Biography Foreword by Vance DeGeneres • Everything You Need to Know About Massachusetts Fish and Wildlife Regulations Foreword by New Kids on the Block member Jonathan Knight • Fly Ball: How the New York Yankees Have Changed Lives Foreword by talk show host Jerry Springer • Terrible Band Names: A Chronology of Rock History Foreword by John Ondrasik, a.k.a. Five for Fighting • God's Wow, You're All F***ing This Up Big Time Foreword by singer-songwriter Mary Lambert . . . any many more!Horrid Henry's Purple Hand Gang Joke Book (Horrid Henry #1)
By Francesca Simon. 2011
Laugh your head off with Horrid Henry, Rude Ralph and the rest of the Purple Hand Gang as they present…
a selection of the best, most hilarious, ridiculously ribtickling jokes sent in by Horrid Henry fans everywhere.Barrel Fever: Stories And Essays
By David Sedaris. 1994
In David Sedaris's world, no one is safe and no cow is sacred. A manic cross between Mark Leyner, Fran…
Lebowitz and the National Enquirer, Sedaris's collection of stories and essays is a rollicking tour through the American Zeitgeist: a man who is loved too much flees the heavyweight champion of the world; a teenage suicide tried to incite a lynch mob at her funeral; and in his essays, David Sedaris considers the hazards of rewards of smoking, writing for Giantess magazine, and living with his scrappy brother Paul, aka 'The Rooster'.With a perfect eye and a voice infused with as much empathy as wit, Sedaris writes and reads stories and essays that target the soulful ridiculousness of our behaviour. Barrel Fever is like a blind date with modern life - and anything can happen.Secrets of a Schoolyard Millionaire
By Nat Amoore. 2021
&‘Laughs, family, friendships and a thrilling adventure – Secrets of a Schoolyard Millionaire has it all.&’ Jen Carney, author of…
The Accidental Diary of B.U.G. &‘Fast-paced, clever and completely hilarious with the BEST cast of characters... LOVE IT TO BITS.&’ Rashmi Sirdeshpande, author of Dosh10-year-old Tess is a born entrepreneur. She just needs to come up with the perfect money-making scheme. Then she finds a million quid buried in her back garden. Never mind where the money came from – Tess and her best friend Toby know exactly how to spend it. But, as it turns out, spending a million isn&’t that easy when you&’re a kid. Cue bouncy castles, sweets, scheming and a whole lot of trouble…Features bonus tips on how to become a schoolyard millionaire inside!