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By Dan Sullivan. 2012
FOREWORD BY SIR DAVID JASONAs Macbeth said to Hamlet in Midsummer Night's Dream, 'we've been done up like a couple…
of kippers - DelIn this pukka 42-carat gold-plated bargain, you have the wit and wisdom of Del Boy, Rodney, Albert, Boycie and Trigger at your disposal. Packed with all the funniest and most memorable lines from the classic British sit-com as it turns 40, this quote book is the crème de la menthe. Never be caught short again.Let's face it Del, most of your phrases come out of a Citroen manual - RodneyBy Spike Milligan. 1991
Spike Milligan's legendary war memoirs are a hilarious and subversive first-hand account of the Second World War, as well as…
a fascinating portrait of the formative years of this towering comic genius, most famous as writer and star of The Goon Show. They have sold over 4.5 million copies since they first appeared.'The most irreverent, hilarious book about the war that I have ever read' Sunday Express'Brilliant verbal pyrotechnics, throwaway lines and marvelous anecdotes' Daily Mail'Desperately funny, vivid, vulgar' Sunday Times'I had not informed my parents of my return, I wanted it to be a lovely surprise; it was, for me, they were away ...' The seventh and last volume of Spike Milligan's memoirs sees our hero returning from war and Italy ... but to what? Aside from shooting large, inaccurate guns at Germans, all he has done for five long years is blow a trumpet, tell rude jokes and write and perform sketches for the entertainment of bored and murderous soldiers - who on earth is going to pay a civilian to do more of that? From the giddy heights of Hackney Empire to a Zurich Freak Show and beyond, Spike makes his way through the backwaters of showbiz, first as band musician then as one-man wild-act and eventually in the company of a group of like-minded comedians called Harry Secombe, Michael Bentine and Peter Sellers. They decide to call themselves The Goons...'That absolutely glorious way of looking at things differently. A great man' Stephen Fry'Milligan is the Great God to all of us' John Cleese'The Godfather of Alternative Comedy' Eddie Izzard'Manifestly a genius, a comic surrealist genius and had no equal' Terry Wogan'A totally original comedy writer' Michael Palin'Close in stature to Lewis Carroll and Edward Lear in his command of the profound art of nonsense' GuardianSpike Milligan was one of the greatest and most influential comedians of the twentieth century. Born in India in 1918, he served in the Royal Artillery during WWII in North Africa and Italy. At the end of the war, he forged a career as a jazz musician, sketch-show writer and performer, before joining forces with Peter Sellers and Harry Secombe to form the legendary Goon Show. Until his death in 2002, he had success as on stage and screen and as the author of over eighty books of fiction, memoir, poetry, plays, cartoons and children's stories.By Peter Owen Jones. 2015
'When we walk, we walk through two landscapes: an exterior land of trees, seas, cities, mountains and fields but we…
also follow the paths that lead into our own interior world.'This thoughtful, and beautifully written, book offers 21 circular walks. They span the length and breadth of the British Isles: Suffolk, Northamptonshire, Wiltshire, Wales, Staffordshire, Scotland, Sussex and Cornwall are just a few of the varied landscapes that they cover.As one of the prime 'walks correspondents' of The Sunday Times, Peter Owen Jones already has a loyal following. This book will only increase his audience, and will be both for those who love walking in the countryside and those who enjoy reading, and musing on it, in their armchair at home.By Dante. 2007
Having plunged to the uttermost depths of Hell and climbed the Mount of Purgatory in parts one and two of…
the Divine Comedy, Dante ascends to Heaven in this third and final part, continuing his soul’s search for God, guided by his beloved Beatrice. As he progresses through the spheres of Paradise he grows in understanding, until he finally experiences divine love in the radiant presence of the deity. Examining eternal questions of faith, desire and enlightenment, Dante exercised all his learning and wit, wrath and tenderness in his creation of one of the greatest of all Christian allegories.By Visnu Sarma, Visnu Sarma. 1993
First recorded 1500 years ago, but taking its origins from a far earlier oral tradition, the Pancatantra is ascribed by…
legend to the celebrated, half-mythical teacher Visnu Sarma. Asked by a great king to awaken the dulled intelligence of his three idle sons, the aging Sarma is said to have composed the great work as a series of entertaining and edifying fables narrated by a wide range of humans and animals, and together intended to provide the young princes with vital guidance for life. Since first leaving India before AD 570, the Pancatantra has been widely translated and has influenced a cast number of works in India, the Arab world and Europe, including the Arabian Nights, the Canterbury Tales and the Fables of La Fontaine. Enduring and profound, it is among the earliest and most popular of all books of fables.By Gary Edwards. 2003
In his dedication to Leeds United, Gary Edwards has no rivals. He has seen every Leeds game since 17 January…
1968, home and away. League, Cup and Europe. And pre-season friendlies.* Hell, he even watches the reserves in his spare time. Following Leeds, he's been there, done that and designed the T-shirt. Although a painter and decorator-cum-signwriter-cum-cartoonist, he's never taken a break from his life as a full-time football fan. He's made a name for himself covering over red paint with white for free. He's visited every country in Europe and flown all over the rest of the world to watch Leeds play. If Leeds organised a five-a-side on the moon, he'd be on the first shuttle flight there. Travelling the world to watch hundreds of players run around acres of grass, he's also found time to drink gallons of ale, see oceans of flesh and protect hundreds of animals. He's saved lobsters in Barcelona, clay pigeons in Worksop, frogs in Kuala Lumpur and worms - yes, worms - in Yorkshire. He's been shot at in Greece, run over in Denmark, frightened the king in Sweden and had a beer with an elephant in Bangkok. All this and still found the time to never miss a match or another chance to rid the world of the evil that is red in all its forms. Behind him are almost four decades of Leeds, lunacy, laughter and white paint.By Dale Shaw. 2019
'Will make everybody laugh' DOLLY ALDERTON ON THE HIGH LOWEnjoy this hilarious collection of over 200 haikus that sum up…
the complex, confusing and often compounding character of the British people.The Sellotape endUnlocatable it seemsChristmas is cancelledHow many gin tinsIs decreed appropriate For this train journey? The sound of a splashMy Hobnob falls to piecesMy tea is sulliedEvery houseplantSuffers a slow painful deathI am a monsterYou're at the seasideA seagull eyes your MagnumYou won't win that fightBy Gervase Phinn. 2000
Over Hill and Dale is the second volume in Gervase Phinn's bestselling Dales series.'Miss, who's that funny man at the…
back of the classroom?So begins school-inspector Gervase Phinn's second year among the frankly spoken pupils and teachers of North Yorkshire - the sight of Gervase with his notebook and pen provokes unexpected reactions from the children and adults alike.But Gervase is far from daunted - he is ready to brave the steely glare of the officious Mrs Savage, and even feels up to helping Dr Gore organize a gathering of the Feofees - just as soon as someone tells him what they are! He is still in pursuit of the lovely headteacher Christine Bentley, but will she feel the same?This is a delectable second helping of hilarious tales from the man who has been dubbed 'the James Herriot of schools'. In Over Hill and Dale, Gervase Phinn will have you laughing out loud.'Gervase Phinn's memoirs have made him a hero in school staff-rooms' Daily TelegraphGervase Phinn is an author and educator from Rotherham who, after teaching for fourteen years in a variety of schools, moved to North Yorkshire to be a school inspector. He has written autobiographies, novels, plays, collections of poetry and stories, as well as a number of books about education. He holds five fellowships, honorary doctorates from Hull, Leicester and Sheffield Hallam universities, and is a patron of a number of children's charities and organizations. He is married with four adult children. His books include The Other Side of the Dale, Over Hill and Dale, Head Over Heels in the Dales,The Heart of the Dales, Up and Down in the Dales and Trouble at the Little Village School.By Geordan Murphy. 2012
Geordan Murphy does not come from the leafy suburbs of south Dublin or the rugby hotbeds of Limerick or Cork.…
As a teenager he played Gaelic football for Kildare minors. But his greatest love, and his true genius, was for rugby. Now nearing the end of a career that has seen him win over seventy Ireland caps - a number that a great many supporters and pundits believe should be considerably higher - and attain the captaincy of the top English club, Leicester, Geordan Murphy tells his own story for the first time.'A delightful read ... brilliant' Rugby World'Bright, breezy, entertaining and revealing' Gerry Thornley, Irish Times'An open, honest and entertaining book' RTE GuideBy Duncan Alexander. 2017
In football, numbers are everywhere. From touches in the opposition box to expected goals, clear-cut chances to win-loss ratios. In…
the modern game, these numbers help provide the narrative, the drama, and the conversation. They are scrutinised in order to justify results and to predict future outcomes. They even dictate transfer policy and drive clubs to achieve the impossible.But when did the numbers become so important and what do they mean?In Outside the Box, Duncan Alexander looks back at twenty-five years of the Premier League and beyond, uncovering the hidden truths and accepted myths that surround the game. Using the archives of OptaJoe and never-before-seen data, we discover why Liverpool have gone 27 years without winning a league title and why Lionel Messi is the best player in the game’s history. Or is he? Insightful, wry, and hugely entertaining, Outside the Box is an enlightening and accessible account of football across the decades, analysing data from the some of the greatest seasons, players, teams and managers.By Kate Rew. 2022
'An important, inspiring book by someone that has encouraged million of people to experience the wonders and friendships of Britain's…
rivers, lakes and seas' ROBERT MACFARLANE'A treasured guide for anyone who wants to venture into rivers, estuaries, lakes and seas for a dip, a moonlit swim or a great adventure. I loved this book!' LYNNE COXCapturing the freewheeling spirit, community and wisdom that defines The Outdoor Swimming Society movement, founder Kate Rew reveals everything you need to know to explore rivers, lakes, seas and estuaries. Sharing tales of her own inspiring swims, Kate explores the rich and varied life of outdoor swimmers, from the physiology of cold to planning lazy hazy downstream swims. An exquisite guide for beginners and enthusiasts alike, The Outdoor Swimmers' Handbook will lead you to the shore and become your trusted companion for the adventures ahead.By Christopher Yates. 2008
Though an enthusiastic sea-fisher as a child, Chris Yates has concentrated on freshwater throughout his fishing life. In Out of…
the Blue he describes his return to the sea after half a life-time and his increasing passion for its changeable moods and habits. Remaining faithful to his fundamental angling ethic – fishing simply with the minimum of tackle and always using his old split cane carp rod – he nets a mass of singular experiences, from the quiet magic of a Dorset tide-pool to the strange delight of casting into the midnight sun off the Norwegian Island of Senja.By Tim Albone. 2011
Cool Runnings meets Joseph O'Neill's Netherland in an inspiring and feel-good story of bravery and sporting success from a country…
so widely known for war and extremism. This is the true story of the Afghanistan cricket team and their extraordinary attempt to join the world's elite cricketing nations. That this devastated nation should be able to field a cricket team at all, let alone one as successful as this, is an unbelievable achievement. Seven years ago, in a country which does not have a real cricket pitch even today, there was no national team. But a group of young Afghan men, exiled by war, learnt to play in the smashed concrete of refugee camps, and have risen from obscurity to the groomed grass pitches of international cricket.With unlimited access, Tim Albone travelled alongside the team for the two years, charting the players' progress from refugees in Pakistan to the brink of international sporting stardom. Far from being bogged down in cricket jargon, this tale of a gang of dedicated, charismatic, occasionally exasperating young men seeking triumph out of disaster is one that will move and inspire everyone.Foreword by Mike Atherton.By Gervase Phinn. 1998
Take a trip to the country with Gervase Phinn's heartwarming tales of life as a school inspector in Yorkshire'Gervase Phinn's…
memoirs have made him a hero in school staff-rooms' Daily Telegraph_______ As the newly appointed County Inspector of Schools in North Yorkshire, Gervase Phinn reveals in this warm and wonderfully humorous account, the experiences of his first year in the job - and what an education it was! He quickly learns that he must slow his pace and appreciate the beautiful countryside - 'Are tha'comin' in then, mester, or are tha' stoppin' out theer all day admirin' t'view?'He encounters some larger-than-life characters, from farmers and lords of the manor to teaching nuns and eccentric caretakers.And, best of all, he discovers the delightful and enchanting qualities of the Dales children, including the small boy, who, when told he's not very talkative, answers: 'If I've got owt to say I says it, and if I've got owt to ask I asks it.' With his keen ear for the absurd and sharp eye for the ludicrous, Gervase Phinn's stories in The Other Side of the Dale will not fail to make you weep with laughter.By Jen Brister. 2019
I'm Jen Brister: stand-up comedian, middle-aged adolescent, and mum. But not that mum - I'm the other one.'Hysterical, important, moving,…
wonderful' Sara PascoeConfused? Two years ago, my partner (a woman - we're not solicitors) gave birth to twins. (I know! Believe me, I'm still reeling myself.) Like every new parent, I had absolutely no clue what I was doing. Add 'gay' and 'non-biological' to the mix and what do you get? Not a weird box of detergent, but a panicked beige lesbian desperately googling, 'Will my babies love me?' at 3 a.m.A very funny, very honest look at parenting life, from IVF awfulness to crying over the pages of sleep training manuals. A perfect gift for any parent who feels they don't fit the mould of a traditional family.*LONGLISTED FOR THE POLARI PRIZE*'Damned funny. You'll find the pages of this book brimming with rich and wonderful proof' Hannah Gadsby'A side-splittingly honest look at the grim realities of same-sex parenting' DivaBy Ossie Ardiles. 2009
Ossie Ardiles is one of the most iconic footballers ever to have graced the game. After winning the World Cup…
with Argentina in 1978, Ossie became the first foreign player to make an impact in England, paving the way for the modern era of multinational teams. and was immortalised in Chas & Dave's hit record "Ossie's Dream (Spurs Are On Their Way to Wembley)".In that unforgettable 1981 FA Cup Final, the silky skills of Ossie and fellow Argentine midfielder Ricky Villa inspired Spurs to their famous victory over Man City. He also helped Spurs to retain the trophy the following year, and to win the UEFA Cup in 1984, and even found time to star in the classic football film Escape to Victory with Bobby Moore, Pelé, Michael Caine and Sylvester Stallone.Thirty years on from those glory days, Ossie has a unique perspective on the football world, through his long career both playing and in management, with the emphasis always on style and entertainment. He also talks about growing up under a military dictatorship, how he was torn between two countries owing to the outbreak of the Falklands War, which claimed the life of one of his cousins, and how that football world has changed over the decades.By Martin King, Martin Knight, Peter Osgood. 2002
In a 16-year career spent with Chelsea and Southampton, goal-scoring legend Peter Osgood made 560 appearances, scoring 220 goals and…
winning two FA Cup-winner's medals. He was part of the victorious Chelsea side that defeated the mighty Real Madrid in the 1971 European Cup-Winners Cup final and is the last player to have scored in every round of the FA Cup, including the final.Ossie tells the story of the career and the extraordinary roller-coaster personal life of the man who spearheaded a team that made as many headlines off the field as on. The truth about the hard-drinking and hard-living antics of these Kings Road dandies - Hudson, Cooke, Baldwin and company - has never before been told. Osgood tells of his strained relationship with manager Dave Sexton, which resulted in his and other stars' departures, triggering a decline in Chelsea FC's fortunes that took some 20 years to reverse. He recounts his experience in the Mexico World Cup of 1970 and is brutally honest about the challenges and problems faced by ex-footballers as they attempt to adjust to life in mainstream society. Peter Osgood was no ordinary footballer and Ossie is no ordinary football autobiography. Like the King of Stamford Bridge himself was, this book is entertaining, outspoken and full of surprises.By Aphra Behn. 2003
Aphra Behn, the poet, playwright, novelist and political satirist was the first truly professional woman writer in English. This selection,…
edited and introduced by Professor Janet Todd, demonstrates the full sophistication and vitality of Aphra Behn's genius. It contains the plays The Rover and The Widow, Ranter (the first English play to be set in the American colonies) together with Love Letters to a Gentleman, a choice of poems and two short novels - The Fair Jilt and Oroonoko - which are among the most innovative prose writings of the seventeenth century.By Aeschylus. 1959
Aeschylus (525-c.456 bc) set his great trilogy in the immediate aftermath of the Fall of Troy, when King Agamemnon returns…
to Argos, a victor in war. Agamemnon depicts the hero's discovery that his family has been destroyed by his wife's infidelity and ends with his death at her callous hand. Clytemnestra's crime is repaid in The Choephori when her outraged son Orestes kills both her and her lover. The Eumenides then follows Orestes as he is hounded to Athens by the Furies' law of vengeance and depicts Athene replacing the bloody cycle of revenge with a system of civil justice. Written in the years after the Battle of Marathon, The Oresteian Trilogy affirmed the deliverance of democratic Athens not only from Persian conquest, but also from its own barbaric past.By Joe Schmidt. 2019
'He's a great coach. He lives and breathes the game. There's nothing he doesn't know' Brian O'Driscoll'The best coach Irish…
rugby - arguably Irish sport - has ever had' Malachy Clerkin, Irish TimesIn the autumn of 2010, a little-known New Zealander called Joe Schmidt took over as head coach at Leinster. He had never been in charge of a professional team. After Leinster lost three of their first four games, a prominent Irish rugby pundit speculated that Schmidt had 'lost the dressing room'.Nine years on, Joe Schmidt has stepped down as Ireland coach having achieved success on a scale never before seen in Irish rugby. Two Heineken Cups in three seasons with Leinster. Three Six Nations championships in six seasons with Ireland, including the Grand Slam in 2018. And a host of firsts: the first Irish victory in South Africa; the first Irish defeat of the All Blacks, and then a second; and Ireland's first number 1 world ranking.Along the way, Schmidt became a byword for precision and focus in coaching, remarkable attention to detail and the highest of standards. But who is Joe Schmidt? In Ordinary Joe, Schmidt tells the story of his life and influences: the experiences and management ideas that made him the coach, and the man, that he is today. And his diaries of the 2018 Grand Slam and the 2019 Rugby World Cup provide a brilliantly intimate insight into the stresses and joys of coaching a national team in victory and defeat.From the small towns in New Zealand's North Island where he played barefoot rugby and jostled around the dinner table with seven siblings, to the training grounds and video rooms where he consistently kept his teams a step ahead of the opposition, Ordinary Joe reveals an ordinary man who has helped his teams to achieve extraordinary things.'Rugby obsessives and amateur coaches will revel in the insight that Schmidt offers into his training methods, tactics and preparation ... Full of insight, emotion and considered analysis' Irish Daily Mail'An insight into the fascinating personality of the man who has been the single most influential figure in Irish rugby over the last decade' Irish Times'He is clearly more than an ordinary coach, the winning of two Heinekens, beating New Zealand twice, the 2018 Grand Slam and reaching no.1 in the World Rankings are positive brushstrokes, marking Irish rugby for ever ... A rocky read about exceptional deeds, told in extraordinary fashion' Irish Daily Star'Undoubtedly the greatest coach in Irish rugby history' Daily Telegraph