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Showing 8081 - 8100 of 8253 items
By Laura Belbin. 2022
Shame, shame we know your nameDo we own it? Being a woman that is. Do we fuck! We live in…
fear of how we look, what we eat, how we age and what we do. Wow, it's 2022 and we're still churning out that same old shit. I've been told as you get older you care less. Fucking great. I can't wait to be menopausal with skunk-like grey track lines in my hair, saggier tits, and miserable as shit. I don't know about you, but I'd quite like to have that experience - the no-fucks-experience that is - now, before that all happens. To have the confidence to believe in who I am. It's a push we all have to make - whether it be in our confidence over our bodies, who we are as people, or what goes on inside our mind - and we all have to work at it. It's baby steps. So let's take it back to those tiny steps, because all mountains that are climbed don't happen without practice, perseverance, self-belief and a fuck ton of work.By Bill Bailey. 2016
'When herons are spooked they have a habit of vomiting as a defence. Half-digested pieces of eel and water vole…
skull on your head is not a good look. Just so you know.'Bill Bailey's Remarkable Guide to British Birds is all about comedian Bailey's love of birds. A visual feast - it is packed with illustrations, sketches and notes by Bailey - as well as informative, it is funny and insightful, and positively crackles with energy, knowledge and wit as he takes us on a journey around the British isles, zooming in on those birds that enthuse him the most. Whether it's what they eat, where they fly to or how they communicate, these birds are always fascinating, and Bailey introduces us to their weird and wonderful ways in a manner that is always entertaining. If you're a parent who'd like to appear a bit clever when your child asks you the name of a bird; if you want to find a new and healthy hobby that takes you outdoors; or whether, quite simply, you want to understand a bit more about our natural environment and have a laugh at the same time, this is the perfect companion book to have.Alongside music and stand-up, one of Bailey's favourite pastimes is birdwatching, which he has been doing since he was a child in the West Country. His fondest memories are of family outings with parents, grandparents and cousins, ticking the birds off in his little Observer's Book of Birds. As he has said about those formative years, 'birdwatching gave a purpose to the day and a love of the natural world which has carried on into my adult life'. A beautifully and originally designed hardback, it will delight Bailey's fans as well as those who like a bit of armchair escapism.By B. J. Lovegood. 2023
Have you ever been ensnared by a Scorpio? Ghosted by a Gemini? Catfished by a Cancer? Well dear reader, this…
is the book for you. Strap in as Astrologer B.J. Lovegood takes you on a journey through the galaxy where you'll learn how to dodge red flags and avoid dating disasters.Never Shag a Scorpio is an amorous adventure through the zodiac. Funny, smutty and embarrassingly accurate, it will teach you how to lure a Leo, turn on a Taurus and impress a Pisces' parents.Complete with full romantic profiles for each star sign and hilarious and handy listicles such as 'Top 5 places to have sex with a Sagittarius' and 'A Taurus's top 5 breakup songs', this book is your go-to guide to navigating the steamy side of astrology.By Griff Rhys Jones. 1983
This wonderful anthology contains some of the nation's all-time favourite comic poetry. From much-loved classics such as Lewis Carroll's curious…
'Jabberwocky' to lesser known and forgotten gems such as Gelett Burgess's 'The Purple Cow', Griff Rhys Jones takes us on a poetic tour of witty, nonsensical and plain laugh-out-loud funny poems. The selection brings together poets from every age and every walk of life, from Shakespeare to Victoria Wood and from Keats to Benjamin Zephaniah. There is Roald Dahl's cunning variation on 'Little Red Riding Hood', Spike Milligan's brilliantly ridiculous 'On the Ning Nang Nong' as well as several entries from the ever-elusive Anon, including one delightfully succint 'Peas'. Remembered, half-remembered, cherished or written on a tea towel, here are some of the nation's favourite comic poems.By Alan Davies. 2009
Alan Davies was always a hoarder. Pages from Smash Hits, rolled up gig posters, Cup Final ticket stubs, Woody Allen…
paperbacks, NME covers and Blondie calendars filled boxes once used to ferry shopping home from supermarkets (back when supermarkets would leave boxes out for the ferrying of shopping). Not much that came down from Alan's bedroom wall made it into the bin, never mind the uninvented bin-liner.Growing up is not easy. So many decisions: Who to revere, Sheene or McEnroe? Who to imitate, Starsky or Hutch? Who to dislike overnight in an effort to show maturity, Thatcher or Scargill? How to decide which pin-ups to unpin when a batch of Animal Rights leaflets or a satirical poster of Ronald Reagan demand wallspace?The Impressionable Age of a young man lasts around a decade and the idols and icons of that period can reveal much of the time and of the impressed subject.Nostalgic, warm and laugh-out-loud funny My Favourite People and Me 1978-1988 is an affectionate trip through a suburban childhood in Essex and an eighties education in Kent. As Alan says, 'an attempt to remember who and what I liked as a boy/youth/idiot and to work out why. There are also some pictures.'By Jeremy Hardy. 2010
When Jeremy Hardy decided to explore his ancestry it was, in part, to get to the bottom of his grandmother…
Rebecca's dubious claims that the family descended from a certain 17th-century architect and that, more recently, Jeremy's great-grandfather was a Royal bodyguard. Other legends ranged from the great aunt who ran illegal hooch during Prohibition to the wronged Victorian servant girl who bore an illegitimate Hardy, not forgetting the family's rightful claim to a large country estate. Wild stories aside, Jeremy sets out to such diverse locations as the Croydon one-way system and the hostile waters around Malta in order to find traces of recognisable family traits and a sense of how he came to be. With wry humour and a keen eye for the absurd and the frustrating, Jeremy takes us on a by turns funny and moving journey into the world of family ancestry. My Family and Other Strangers will be enjoyed by anyone who has tried to decipher the 1901 census records, or simply wishes they too had asked their grandparents more about their lives.By Brendan O'Carroll. 2013
Uncover hilarious and unique insights into the Brown family, in Brendan O'Carroll's first official book on his NTA winning comic…
creation Mrs Brown's Boys.Millions od us have wondered: how does Agnes Brown do it? Keeping her end up while seven grown-up children tear about the fecking place like the eejits don't have a home to go to.Packed with Mammy's tips for keeping a perfect family - or at least, just a family - as well as contributions from her children, neighbours and other hangers on, Mrs Brown's Family Handbook dispenses endless advice in her fecking fantastic style.You'll learn: Why every mammy's secret weapon is the tea towel The dos and don'ts of cleaning up Granddad What Dermot doesn't know about farting (not much) What Winnie knows about seks (not enough) All about the Five-Sausages-A-Day Diet (hint: contains sausages) From Maria, all about pain relief in child birth (if it's free, fecking take it)The must-have gift for any Mrs Brown fan, Mrs Brown's Family Handbook is perfect for equally large and chaotic families, or those in small families curious about what they're missing...Brendan O'Carroll is an Irish writer, producer, comedian, actor, director and author. He is best known for playing Agnes Brown in Mrs Brown's Boys, which won the best sitcom BAFTA in 2012 and best comedy at the National Television Awards 2020. He has written four films and nine comedy shows, including The Course (1995) and The Last Wedding (1999). He has also published seven novels, including The Mammy, The Scrapper and The Young Wan - a number of which have been translated into 12 languages.By Jeremy Clarkson. 2004
Jeremy Clarkson invites us to Motorworld, his take on different cultures and the cars that they drive.There are ways and…
means of getting about that don't involve four wheels, but in this slice of vintage Clarkson, Jeremy isn't much interested in them.Back in 1996, he took himself off to twelve countries (okay, eleven - he goes to America twice) in search of the hows, whys and wherefores of different nationalities and their relationships with cars. There were a few questions he needed answers to:* Why, for instance, is it that Italians are more interested in looking good than looking where they are going?* Why do Indians crash a lot?* How can an Arab describe himself as 'not a rich man' with four of the world's most expensive cars in his drive? * And why have the otherwise neutral Swiss declared war on the car?From Cuba to Iceland, Australia to Vietnam, Japan to Texas, Jeremy Clarkson tells us of his adventures on and off four wheels as he seeks to discover just what it is that makes our motorworld tick over. _____________Praise for Jeremy Clarkson:'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening StandardBy Richard Topping. 2007
Have you ever wanted to be a lumberjack? Had trouble with a dead parrot? Or gone for a silly walk?Combining…
outrageous humour, unbridled creativity and surreal animation, John Cleese, Michael Palin, Graham Chapman, Terry Gilliam, Terry Jones and Eric Idle entertained millions and inspired generations of future comedians. Including all Monty Python material ever produced, from the Flying Circus to the Life of Brian to Spamalot! with biographies, programme guides and a filmography, this is a must-have plethora of Pythonism and a fitting tribute to comedic pioneers.By Spike Milligan. 1976
VOLUME THREE OF SPIKE MILLIGAN'S LEGENDARY MEMOIRS IS A HILARIOUS, SUBVERSIVE FIRST-HAND ACCOUNT OF WW2'The most irreverent, hilarious book about…
the war that I have ever read' Sunday Express 'Brilliant verbal pyrotechnics, throwaway lines and marvelous anecdotes' Daily Mail ______________ 'It's all over, Von Arnheim has surrendered and he's very angry.' 'This could mean war . . .' The third volume of Spike Milligan's laugh-a-line account of life as a gunner in World War Two resumes on the eve of victory in North Africa. Now Britain's looniest war hero must combat some of the direst threats a soldier has ever faced - boredom ('Christ, I just thought of Catford'), moving camp ('It's a sort of Brighton with camels'), moving camp again ('We're already somewhere else'), a visit to Carthage ('It's terrible, it's like Catford') and a perilous encounter with the gloriously endowed Mademoiselle Villion ('"Help! massage," I said weakly').Against the odds, they survive and are sent at last to Italy to be killed...______________ 'That absolutely glorious way of looking at things differently. A great man' Stephen Fry 'The Godfather of Alternative Comedy' Eddie Izzard 'Manifestly a genius, a comic surrealist genius and had no equal' Terry Wogan 'A totally original comedy writer' Michael Palin 'Close in stature to Lewis Carroll and Edward Lear in his command of the profound art of nonsense' GuardianBy Richard Horne. 2013
Tired of the dull daily commute to the office, the tedious traipse to and from the school gates? Fed up…
with the seemingly endless shades of grey that decorate the canvas of modern life? Then the time has come to open your eyes!For in the midst of those soulless sceneries and vacant vistas there lies a wealth of fascinating detail. Look up! Look carefully all around! Where once there was monotony, now there is intrigue in abundance; sights and sounds sure to delight and amuse, amaze and entertain, to brighten each and every day - for once you spot, you can’t stop.The Modern Day Spotter’s Guide brings together the fun and frustrating, the maddening and the mundane, the good, the bad and the ugly to offer you a list of unlikely things to spot on your daily trudge through life. So be sure to keep your eyes peeled: for whether it be a cat with a moustache, a hopelessly lost tourist, a pigeon with one foot, an embarrassing wardrobe malfunction or the face of Jesus in your soup, the world is waiting to be spotted. See things a little differently. And, remember, life is in the details – don’t let them pass you by.By Rhonda Yearn. 2020
Shag yourself zen.Release all stress with 60 calmer-sutra sexercises and meditations.With easy-to-follow instructional diagrams, and memorable mantras, this book will…
show you how to achieve inner peace, the fun way. Redirect your energy, master the power of intention. Inhale. Exhale, Cooooooohm.By Spike Milligan. 2012
Spike Milligan's legendary war memoirs are a hilarious and subversive first-hand account of the Second World War, as well as…
a fascinating portrait of the formative years of this towering comic genius, most famous as writer and star of The Goon Show. They have sold over 4.5 million copies.With his lightning-quick wit, unbridled creativity and his ear for the absurd, Milligan revolutionised British comedy, leaving a legacy of influence that stretches from Monty Python's Flying Circus to the work of self-confessed acolytes such as Eddie Izzard and Stephen Fry today.Throughout his life, Milligan wrote prolifically - scripts, poetry, fiction, as well as several volumes of memoir, in which he took an entirely idiosyncratic approach to the truth. In this ground-breaking work, Norma Farnes, his long-time manager, companion, counsellor and confidante, gathers together the loose threads, reads between the lines and draws on the full breadth of his writing to present his life in his own words: an autobiography - of sorts.From his childhood in India, through his early career as a jazz musician and sketch-show entertainer, his spells in North Africa and Italy with the Royal Artillery, to that fateful first broadcast of The Goon Show and beyond into the annals of comedy history, this is the autobiography Milligan never wrote.It's the most hilarious time of the year...Packed full of festive pop-culture quizzes, Christmas trivia to fascinate and holly jolly…
games to play - as well as colouring and dot-to-dot pages to distract, and cracking cracker jokes to make you chuckle (and groan).The perfect Christmas companion for work Christmas parties, entertaining friends and family, entertaining kids (including kids), when you're too full to move, there's nothing on the TV, it's too wet for a walk and the pub isn't open yet.A book everyone will love, actually...By Luke Barclay. 2008
The toilet - it's small, functional and using it usually involves staring at a door. But for the water closet…
connoisseur, there are a handful of places where the loo is an area of outstanding beauty.From such fascinating locations as the summit loo on Mount Sinai and Maharajas' thrones in India to safari loos in Zambia and ultra-modern, multi-functional facilities in Japan, this is a collection of the most uplifting vistas from the latrines of the world.Answering the call of nature will take you from the functional to the sublime with the help of this, the ultimate good loo guide.By John Scally. 2017
As former England striker and television pundit Jimmy Greaves famously said, football is 'a funny old game'. In A Load…
of Balls: Football's Funny Side, John Scally confirms the truth of his statement by providing a potpourri of double entendres, timeless quips and amusing anecdotes from the tongues of football's elite. Hundreds of silly stories and priceless nuggets have been sourced to recreate the unique excitement, drama and unpredictability of football in the words of the sport's practitioners. The result is a wry, quirky and sometimes outlandish catalogue of comic creations. For lovers of the absurd, outrageous and totally bizarre, this selection of stories and quotes will amuse and delight. Packed with priceless gaffes from the likes of David Beckham ('My parents have been there for me since I was about seven'), Bobby Robson ('We didn't underestimate them; they were just a lot better than we thought') and Paul Gascoigne ('I've never made any predictions about anything and I never will'), this hilarious collection is guaranteed to tickle the funny bone of even the most casual sports fan.By Michael McIntyre. 2010
Discover the real Michael McIntyre through his remarkable and hilarious journey to comedy stardom in his first official autobiography'This book…
showed me the REAL Michael McIntyre' 5***** READER REVIEW'It made me laugh, cry, laugh, laugh and laugh some more' 5***** READER REVIEW'Simply is a must read . . . His story is fascinating' 5***** READER REVIEW'To anyone who loves Michael McIntyre - you will not be disappointed!' 5***** READER REVIEWTHE NO. 1 BESTSELLER_______Michael McIntyre is Britain's biggest comedy star. But how did he get there? Michael reveals all in his remarkably honest and hilarious autobiography, Life and Laughing.From his showbiz roots to his appalling attempts to attract the opposite sex, his fish-out-of-water move from public to state school, and his astonishing journey from selling just one ticket at the Edinburgh Festival to selling half a million tickets on tour.Filled with riveting anecdotes and poignant lessons, Life and Laughing is the unmissable story of Britain's biggest comedian's rise to stardom.Above all, it's very, very funny.By Al Murray. 2015
In Let's re-Great Britain, Al Murray's Pub Landlord sets out his party's vision for the country, and explains how politics…
actually works.Citizens of Hope & Glory! It's time to bring common sense to the House of Commons.Parliament is a nest of slippery, poisonous vipers and only a bonkers, mental idiot would try to make sense of it. Yet in Let's re-Great Britain, Al Murray, the Pub Landlord, presents his guide to British politics and a vision for a Greater Britain.In it you'll learn and appreciate The Guv's views and policies on:- The jobless: Fix youth unemployment with a pyramid scheme (literally, build some pyramids)- Economics: Cut the deficit by borrowing more, growing a beard and leaving the country- Criminal Justice: Bring back hanging if only for the sake of the rope industry- Immigration: Electrify the English ChannelA plain, common-sense vision of an impossibly complicated (and, frankly, dull) subject, this will almost certainly be one day hailed as the new founding text of the nation - a Magna Carta 2.0 from the Landlord of Hope and Glory.By Dave Rear. 2012
Refreshes the parts other history books can’t reach...A bit ropy on the Renaissance?In the dark about the Enlightenment?Or, in fact,…
do you need a revision course on the entire history of the world and want to read a witty, irreverent, definitely not boring romp through everything that has ever happened on planet earth – from 15 billion years BC to the present day? Good.A Less Boring History of the World tells you everything you need to know from the Big Bang to Barack Obama, taking in the Byzantines, the Black Death, Bin Laden and the fall of bankers along the way, all boiled down to bite size chunks so that you can finally piece together all the different bits of history - and see how on earth we ended up in the mess we are today. A Less Boring History refreshes your memory and broadens your mind. And, if that’s not enough, it will also make you laugh. A lot.By Various. 2011
Well, it just gets worse and worse doesn't it? Collapsing banks, collapsing countries, massive government cuts, rising debt, inflation and…
the possibility of a double dip. It's amid all this uncertainty that the already embattled modern woman needs the best advice she can get about how to be as cool and calm in life as possible. Keep Calm for Ladies offers the same pearls of life wisdom, inspirational quotes, proverbs and mantras as Keep Calm and Carry On but with women at their wits' end in mind. An emergency pocket survival bible for today's plucky female.'Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got' Janis Joplin'A man would prefer to come home to an unmade bed and a happy woman than to a neatly made bed and an angry woman' Marlene Dietrich'Remember, blood is not only much thicker than water, it's much more difficult to get out of the carpet' Phyllis Diller'In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman' Margaret Thatcher'Never eat more than you can lift' Miss Piggy