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Showing 1 - 20 of 10414 items
By Annabel Goldsmith. 2006
A loveable local legend and true character to all who knew him, Copper was no ordinary dog. With more stories…
to tell than you could count on the pads of one paw, this curly-tailed, shaggy-bearded mongrel (but don't let him hear you call him that) led a truly astonishing life. Famed for his remarkable wanderlust, canine curiosity took him all over the place, from Richmond and Kingston to Brighton, sometimes travelling on buses with his friend Jessie the cat, often stopping off at his favourite pubs, or chasing unsuspecting joggers in the park - a hobby which nearly ended his life. In this delightful book, Copper tells us of his astounding adventures with the finest of tail-wagging wisdom. He sniffs out all the important things in life: the comings and goings, the loves and losses - and, of course, what it's like to live in high society. Sometimes cheeky, most of the time charming, but always cherished, Copper's story is by turns funny and moving, the tale of a real canine hero.There's an epidemic sweeping the nationSymptoms include:*Acute embarrassment at the mere notion of 'making a fuss'*Extreme awkwardness when faced with…
any social greeting beyond a brisk handshake *An unhealthy preoccupation with meteorology Doctors have also reported several cases of unnecessary apologising, an obsessive interest in correct queuing etiquette and dramatic sighing in the presence of loud teenagers on public transport. If you have experienced any of these symptoms, you may be suffering from VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS.VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS are highly contagious. There is no known cure.Rob Temple's hilarious new book reveals all the ways in which we are a nation of socially awkward but well-meaning oddballs, struggling to make it through every day without apologising to an inanimate object. Take comfort in misfortunes of others. You are not alone.By Fi Cotter-Craig, Zebedee Helm. 2012
The Middle Class ABC is the book loos, bedside tables and farmers markets the length and breadth of the land…
have been waiting for - a humorous celebration of the facts (some are even true) and foibles, manners and mores, peccadilloes and armadillos, of contemporary British middle-class life.Letter by letter, the occasionally clever, witty and absurd observations and cartoons will ring true for all good Middlings. WARNING: you might even recognize your own or your friends' choices of children's names, foodie fads, holiday destinations . . . Crammed with affectionately teasing jokes and some truly dreadful puns, this is a book to enjoy at any time of the year in the course of going about one's business.By Jeff Green. 2002
What happens when those two most incompatible of creatures - the human male and the human female - settle down…
for a life of togetherness and arguments about the toilet seat? Award-winning comedian Jeff Green bravely sets out to discover the truth. Why is, 'Wow, you're a fantastic cleaner', not considered a compliment? And what is it about women and candles...? Along the way he offers helpful advice (why you shouldn't cheer when your partner says, 'I'm not angry, I'm disappointed'), handy tips (ways to avoid becoming broody: get up every hour throughout the night and burn £200) and essential buys (see 'exercise equipment and other places to hang wet washing'). Whether you're hopelessly coupled or gratefully single, The A-Z of Living Together has all the answers you need. Because it's not just men who behave badly...By Jeff Green. 2006
Congratulations! You're having a baby! Or maybe you're a proud parent, holding your little bundle of joy with a mixture…
of ecstasy, wonder and sheer unadulterated TERROR? But don't panic! Real help is at hand, in the form of new dad and award-winning comedian Jeff Green. Let him guide you through the late nights, the stretch marks, the haemorrhoids... (and that's just the dads) and reassure you that you are NOT ALONE. So Dad, if you're suffering from father blues (the slow realisation that all your holidays will now be at Center Parcs), and Mum, if you're still miffed that your partner kept just out of punching range during childbirth, then this book is most definitely for you. Because it's not just babies who have teething problems...By Gary Paulsen. 1979
By Jimmy Greaves, Ian St John. 2009
Saint and Greavsie, sport's most loved double-act, have entertained millions of people over the years - first on the football…
pitches of their respective clubs and countries, then later together on the nation's television screens.They've collected a vast array of stories along the way from fellow sportspeople and pundits: some comical, some crazy, and most downright unbelievable, but all of them thoroughly entertaining. In Saint and Greavsie's Funny Old Games the duo have reunited to tell the very best of these anecdotes in their own unmistakeable style. Containing tales from the dressing-room, secrets about some of the world's biggest stars, and amazing facts from across the sporting spectrum, this hilarious book is the perfect read for any sports fan.By Steve Lowe, Alan McArthur. 2009
Britishness: what does it really mean? Is it all a big con? Having skewered modern British life in the bestselling…
Is It Just Me or is Everything Shit?, Steve Lowe and Alan MacArthur set out to uncover the deep dark truth about Britain - its history, its myths and its people.Over the course of a year they watch Dorset Morris men dancing on a chalk-giant's thirty-foot-long erection, endure the Last Night of the Proms and search for a couple of pissed dragons under a hill in Wales. They ask Prince William what it means to be British, witness Scotland rising again (a bit), encounter terrifying Europhobe ladies in Surrey, and lose the will to live in Gibraltar. They also meet a lot of druids.Hilarious, timely and provocative, Blighty offers a brilliant, alternative vision of the island in the Atlantic that some people call Britain.By Jon Butler, Bruno Vincent. 2008
The letters page of Old Git magazine continues to offer its readers an opportunity to ask and provide answers to…
the most pressing questions of our times. Questions such as:Would it help global warming if I left my fridge door open?What's the riskiest game of risk ever played? If I fell down a disused mineshaft would Lassie really run and get help, or just sit there licking his balls?Do Bats Have Bollocks? features a host of completely new and untrue questions and answers. With bags more rude jokes, shaggy dog stories and the odd entry from a new, bewildered editor who's wondering what the hell he's got himself into, this book is every bit as laugh-out-loud funny as last year's hugely successful volume Do Ants Have Arseholes?By Scott Kennedy. 2013
How Toronto’s own city farms were crowded out First settled in the early nineteenth century, the area now known as…
Don Mills retained its rural character until the end of the Second World War. After the war, population growth resulted in pressure to develop the area around Toronto and, in a relatively short time, the landscape of Don Mills was irreparably altered. Today, the farms are all gone, as are almost all of the barns and farmhouses. Fields and forests have been replaced by the industries, homes, and shops of Canada’s “first subdivision.” In Don Mills: From Forests and Farms to Forces of Change, author Scott Kennedy remembers Don Mills as it was and takes great care to make sure that the farms and farmers are not forgotten.By J M S Careless. 1996
This sampling of the work of J.M.S. Careless in the area of Canadian historical studies was selected by the eminent…
scholar himself, and represents much of his finest work. The collection spans the years from 1940 to 1990 in the long and distinguished career of one of Canada’s best-known historians. In Careless’s own words, History is dated. Its very claim is that the past does not fade into nothing but continues to matter, whether or not the purely present-minded are able to recognize that basic fact. These essays cover the main lines of Careless’s career in Canadian scholarship. The collection is divided into four general subject areas each covering a main preoccupation in a distinguished career of over forty years. The first section concentrates on the earliest theme in his writing, George Brown and his times. The second centres on exploring various aspects of frontierism and metropolitanism in Canadian history. The third part deals with cities and regions focusing particularly on the West and nineteenth century Ontario. The final section picks up the threads of other themes including limited identities Canada and multiculturalism.By Lieutenant-General J H P M Caron, Roch Legault, Colonel Bernd Horn. 2007
French Canadians have a long, proud history of serving their nation. From the earliest beginnings, French Canadians assisted in carving…
out and defending the nascent country. They were critical as defenders and as allies against hostile Natives and competing European powers. In the aftermath of the conquest, they continued, albeit under a different flag, to defend Canada. Loyal Service examines the service of a number of French-Canadian leaders and their contributions to the nation during times of peace, crisis, and conflict spanning the entire historical spectrum from New France to the end of the twentieth century.By Bryan Prince. 2015
The story of African Canadians who fled slavery in the United States but returned to enlist in the Union forces…
during the American Civil War. On New Year’s Eve in 1862, blacks from across British North America joined in spirit with their American fellows in silent vigils to await the enactment of President Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation. The terms declared that slaves who were held in the districts that were in rebellion would be free and that blacks would now be allowed to enlist in the Union Army and participate in the civil war that had then raged for more than a year and a half. African Canadians who had fled from the United States had not forgotten their past and eagerly sought to do their part in securing rights and liberty for all. Leaving behind their freedom in Canada, many enlisted in the Union cause. Most served as soldiers or sailors while others became recruiters, surgeons, or regimental chaplains. Entire black communities were deeply affected by this war that profoundly and irrevocably changed North American history.By Rich Hall. 2002
I stopped off at the Peace Gardens - a memorial straddling the US-Canadian border commemorating 'Lasting Peace Between America and…
Canada', as if there had ever been a problem. Show me a garden commemorating Peace Between America and, say, Iraq and I'll be impressed. America is like a beauty contestant. It's gorgeous, until it opens its mouth.'From the similarities between US gun laws and British drinking hours, to what cryptic crosswords really tell us about the British psyche, American in London Rich Hall casts a keen eye on the lunatic contradictions and weird marvels of his native and adoptive homelands.'Full of acute left-field reflections on America and Americans, plus some marvellously irreverent sketches ...wise, witty and strangely true' GUARDIANBy Jeff Green. 2003
Ah, the single life. The blind dates, the guiltless sleeping in the starfish position, the 'table for one in a…
draught, please'. In his hilarious new book, Jeff Green offers practical advice on how to find love, or failing that how to pretend you've got a significant other half. For women: Leave the fridge door open for no reason. For men: Wash your towels. And if you've just been dumped, Jeff shows how you can reach 'closure', otherwise known as uncompromising REVENGE. Also includes:** Great chat-up lines for the older lover: 'Did you break a hip when you fell from heaven?' ** Beauty tips for dates: How to look twenty years younger? Stand further away ** Things not to say on a first date: Would you like to see my shrine to the others? ** And at last, the truth about what women really want*If you're in a couple, this book will remind you why your own situation is - just about - worth tolerating. And if you're happily single, follow Jeff's advice and you're guaranteed to stay that way... * everythingBy Jon Butler, Bruno Vincent. 2007
How easy is it to fall off a log? Where is the middle of nowhere? Do we really have no…
bananas? The readers of OLD GIT magazine are a batty, befuddled, potty-mouthed bunch, who seem to spend a significant chunk of their spare time corresponding with the publication's popular letters page. DO ANTS HAVE ARSEHOLES? is a very funny, very silly collection of questions and answers taken from this column, none of which has any basis whatsoever in fact. A must for all those who relish a heady mixture of shaggy-dog stories, toilet humour and utter lack of insight.By Richard Peck. 1993
When Bambi Babcock's TV-producer father bankrupt, the Babcocks have to get out of Los Angeles ... fast. Dad heads for…
his hometown of Hickory Fork, which he remembers as a wholesome place for kids to grow up. But Bambi, her sister Buffie, and their little brother Brick come up against the Mall Rats, a down-home teenage gang run by scary Tanya and beef Jeeter. When the Mall Rats walk into school dives for cover. They've already trashed the mall. Bambi knows that if her show-biz family is going to get stuck here, they must turn the school around and save the town. The Mall Rats will never know what hit them.By Tom Papa. 2018
I have been a close friend of Tom Papa for 17 years His lack of ability to perceive even…
the most basic principles of human functioning have made him an invaluable asset to me as a friend and colleague Because he sees nothing knows nothing and understands nothing I always seek his advice for the most complex matters Furthermore I would definitely recommend whatever the name of this book is because I know it comes from a place of pure nonsense without any knowledge of anything He is really one of my favorite people Jerry Seinfeld author of SeinLanguage Finally a funny book about parenting Great observations Great writing Actually funny I ve always known Tom was hysterical now I know he is a great writer and a fantastic storyteller Can Tom Papa write all books Jim Gaffigan author of Dad is FatIt s hard being a person especially in a family and no one knows that better than stand-up comedian family man and Live From Here head writer and performer Tom Papa How do you deal with a life filled with a whole host of characters and their bizarre inescapable behavior Especially when you re related to them Tom Papa is here to help you make sense of it all Your Dad Stole My Rake is a hilarious and warm book that saws deep into every branch of the family tree and uncovers the most bizarre and surprisingly meaningful aspects of our lives He exposes everyone from crazy aunts with mustaches grandparents who communicate by yelling and uncles who use marijuana as a condiment Among the topics covered - Tiger Mom v Ice-Cream Mom - Stop Trying to be Cool - In Defense of Family Vacations - No Fighting Before Coffee - Least Popular Baby Names - Wife Lie Detector - Your Cat Thinks You re Too Needy Anyone who has a family grew up in a family or has spent time with another human being will love this bookBy Clive Whichelow, Hugh Murray. 2007
Over last thirty years, new technology, fashion, and social set-ups have spawned new cliches galore. Everything on the Internet is…
available at the 'click of a mouse', TV presenters ask the audience to 'give it up' when they want them to applaud, call centres tell us 'we value your call' even though 'all our operators are busy'. And if you're 'gobsmacked' by all this you may be told to 'get a life', 'chill out' or 'whatever'. It's Not Rocket Science sifts through all aspects of modern life to find the most prevalent, ubiquitous and downright irritating cliches of our age. This high-octane, caffeine-fuelled, dictionary of cliches highlights the freshly-hackneyed phrases we're being subjected to 24/7. So how good is that? And what's not to like?By Irvin S. Cobb.